Please help

Please pray that I can be happy without punishing myself and stay happy. I know that I’m not always going to be happy but I would love to stay happy when I do get happy

I feel so burnt out. I’m not enjoying life anymore. I’m either extremely bored, sad, pr anxious at work, I come home and don’t even want to cook, watch Netflix but don’t even want to watch anything, and just want to crawl in bed, cry, and go to bed. I don’t want to do anything and work, chores, cooking, etc. are extremely hard for me to do. I compare myself to my roomate who works from home, is accomplished in her job, cooks a lot, enjoys tv, and way more extroverted and mature than I am. Sometimes it gets annoying and it’s the last thing I need. She sometimes “mothers” me and makes sure I know what I’m doing in the kitchen. I feel like I can’t talk to an erp therapist about things like this because I think it’s more than just erp therapy that I need. I’m struggling to take care of myself and don’t enjoy things anymore. I’m scared but feel numb about the future. I’m just exhausted, annoyed, and bored all the time. I also feel like I don’t like myself and judge myself constantly. I wish I could be more confident, have a more fun personality, felt motivated to do things, actually enjoy them, and have friends and family who would 100% understand me. I also wish I was more so a leader but I’m not. How can I live a more exciting life? I’m so bored and depressed everyday. I hate it.

feel really down like i'll never be able to live my life i feel i'm never truly happy i just have to get by i feel stuck ive had loads of therapy cbt nothing will ever really help me 😞