Like I want to know this cause I have guilt, anxiety, sadness and all of these feelings more than the other feelings. So what is considered as happiness in this recovery process?
Over Christmas, aside from one episode, there were several whole days where I barely noticed the thoughts. I went to see my friends at their houses, went out for drinks, and had dinner with my family. I was present at all of these in a way I haven't been in years. No trying to dodge thoughts, no bubbling emotion, just present. Happiness, I think, is being able to be present even for a little bit of time, and hopefully watching that become longer and more frequent.
I think good moments can truly pull someone out. Not completely but slowly. When I was little, I didn’t know it at the time but I struggled heavily with different subtypes of ocd. I think the more you rely on the people around you, those who love you, support you, adore you, the easier the burden gets. I know how crippling it can feel but you have to keep yourself busy, and interactive. When you’re forced to do productive things, your mind has less space to be consumed with thought. Remember that these thoughts aren’t you, and that there are people who love and support you.
Fellowship has been key for me as well! Beautiful reply, thank you for this ❤️
I agree with both comments! Happiness is rooted in the present oftentimes. Even if it's for literally 2 minutes, there is moments of happiness sprinkled in everywhere
I concur! Allowing our thoughts to just BE as we focus on the things in life outside of us that bring us joy and serenity has been so helpful ✨️
I know how you feel. I often wonder if I will ever truly be happy
@Nic12 You will!
The things that used to make me happy? The things that used to make me sad? I don't know how to connect with those anymore. I used to be happy just looking at the sunset and nature, I loved being present in the moment but now being present in the moment is scary because now I'm faced with my thoughts and new potential ones so I'd rather distract myself. I love kballads and I used to listen to them and just cry and be happy because they sound so beautiful but now I can't embrace these things that feel like beauty because I feel like the exact opposite. The only things I can enjoy are K-drama's! But I can't watch things with kids in it. So yah that's tricky! And the things that make me sad?! Well I used to be sad and terrified about loosing my loved ones but now it's a different kind of sad. I used to be sad because of miss them and all that but now I'm scared of facing now messed up my emotions have become. I'm scared of loosing someone I love and then not being able to feel sad because I'm just numb, or even worse...if it becomes something I'm okay with or what if OCD convinces me that I'm happy about it because honestly it would be weird moving around the world with such emotions. So not only has OCD made it hard for me to enjoy the good things but also hard for me to feel sad about the sad things or just to put it short...to experience emotions normally.
So I’ve noticed that my OCD has calmed down, I’m getting less intrusive thoughts but I feel more uncertain than ever. Is this normal for recovery?
Whenever anyone starts to feel like their thoughts are less triggering or they feel a moment of happiness/ relief OCD tells you that you want the thoughts back or you actually like having the thoughts and maybe thats just the person I really am? I feel like im going insane😢
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