My mind is saying I ruin my marriage

I have a conversation with a male friend. We haven't talked in years ( we was cool peeps and always respectful ) I was in this state where I felt if I didn't tell people they matter while they're still here that I would feel horrible if they died and I didn't tell them. I lost my uncle and was feeling horrible that I didn't spend more time with them. It's was so intense that sometimes I would get emotional. I told my male friend that they always had a friend and hope they're doing well and I hope his family is in good health. And hope we can be friends. I always wanted to be respectfully to my husband and to his partner so I also said that i wasn't trying to be disrespectful or anything because I'm not the kind of person and if I caused any disrespect and if I did please forgive me. ( I always tried to be respectful and treat people how I want to be treated and respected boundaries) But for the past few months I thoughts about what if we dated and got married how would that be. Sometimes would just be in a daydream but also I would daydream all of us meeting up and hangout and being friends. My brain is always on and moving. Then I bomb went of in my mind. Full of what ifs and did i ruin my marriage and had emotional affair I never ran to my male friend and confined in him, I never called or told him I loved him or we should ran off or said anything like that. Or discuss any personal information about my relationship.Sometimes we wouldn't talk for days ,weeks , or months. Our Conversation was always uplifting and encouragement. And one time I said I was proud of him for finding God after dealing with intense grief and encouraging to pour that into something creative. And some funny memes I have went over our conversation looking if I said anything that might disrespect or gave the wrong impression. I didn't see anything but my brain 🧠 keeps looking He knows i'm in committed relationship And I would never respect his relationship or mines . Never !!! I would never hurt my husband in any way. My mind keep looping over and again bring up new things and I'm so tired and stressed over this. I tell myself it was just thoughts, it's was just thoughts everyone has them. I'm scared to tell my therapist about this , I'm afraid that I would be judged as a horrible person. I feel like maybe I shouldn't have male friends , in the past a male person I thought was a friend did come on to me and made me feeling extremely uncomfortable and kept trying to force me to be with him. It's was a horrible experience. I had to look him in the eye and tell him I don't want you and leave me alone. He finally got the hint and I never saw him again. This why my OCD was triggered??? Because of a past experience? Did I ruin my marriage? Should cut off this friendship ? *Me and husband are comfortable having friendship with the opposite sex.