So I have only ever dated men and im currently in a relationship. Recently I have noticed that I've started to have the same feelings towards men abt a girl I work with. More so that I think shes attractive and kind of fantasize about her. But this leads me to the point of what if my pocd thoughts are real and one day this will be the case in that regard? Also how do ik if im bi?
I'm trying to think how to answer this as bisexual woman (I've actually been very preoccupied with being potentially straight recently LOL) without causing more rumination. Does your anxiety about attraction to women exist independently of your fears about children? Like, does your attraction to your coworker cause anxiety on its own, or is it mostly the typical butterflies with the POCD on the side.
@sophea But the truth is, if you decide that dating women in the future would only cause you more distress than pleasure, even if maybe you are actually attracted to them, you don't need to date women. There is nobody forcing you to date everyone you've ever been attracted to.
@sophea well the idea of dating and being attracted to women doesn't really cause me distress. the pocd is kinda in the background worried that its going to become true. like u said its the typical butterflies with pocd on the side. like the feelings ig u would normally feell towards a man.
@sophea and if thats true abt not dating everyone uve been attracted to. that just adds to my pocd of even tho I haven't done anything i could still have attraction.
@ran_0fff - I'm not going to touch on the POCD trigger because I don't want to set you off further, but, sorry, that obviously wasn't my intention. However, if attraction to women alone isn't causing notable distress, that doesn't sound like SOOCD to me. I read a lot of lot of lesbian books when I was exploring my sexuality, so I can recommend that. I imagine tv and movies would have the same effect, but I'm not a movie person. I'm sorry that what should be an exciting period of self exploration and discovery (even if you ultimately decide you're mostly straight after all) is being tainted by obsessions! <3
@sophea yes in high school I remember watching jennifers body and enjoying the kiss scene. and looking back i think I had feelings for my girl best friend at the time but chalked it up to admiration. its honestly confusing. and ive always kind of questioned since probably 9th grade. and everyone told me that I did so thats what really set it off. Like I think I could date or kiss a girl but im not sure.
I don't suffer from SOOCD but I know I'm bisexual. You could maybe try kissing a woman if your relationship ends or something. But if you are attracted to men then that rules out being a lesbian.
I have kissed a girl and liked it
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