Username: Anxiousaddie

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 14d ago

Please help- so-ocd

I did an erp and I was thinking over and over again “I want to be with girls I just don’t want others to find out” and then it felt like a moment of yeah that is what I want. It felt really real I can’t believe it’s not. I wasn’t anxious about it. It felt completely like me and even when I tried to deny it like it was a true realization and that I wanted it to be true. I can’t do this. What do I do!!! Erp suggestions?

Sexual Orientation OCD

Username: ejpwolfpackejpwolfpack

Date posted: 14d ago

Hey I fully understand this. My soocd shifted to mainly getting feelings like this after doing erp for a while. It’s crazy what ocd can morph into. False attraction, arousal, feelings, they can all start to feel like you actually want it. It’s super confusing but I want you to know I understand.

Username: AnxiousaddieAnxiousaddie

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 14d ago

@ejpwolfpack Yeah like it felt so real. Like that’s what I wanted I just didn’t want others to know. It felt like acceptance! I just feel like there’s no uncertainty just facts. It didn’t make me anxious, I just got anxious after.

Username: kreliakrelia

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 14d ago

@Anxiousaddie You’re not alone!!

Username: ejpwolfpackejpwolfpack

Date posted: 13d ago

@Anxiousaddie I’ve typed these exact words myself. If you ever need more support believe me I understand fully what you’re going through. Do you know Chrissie Hodges?

Username: AnxiousaddieAnxiousaddie

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 9d ago

@ejpwolfpack Hi, I didn't reply because I was having a good couple days but really? I feel lr it was so true. I'd like to know more ab your experience if you don't mind sharing. And yes, I do know her!! Have any specific recommendarions from her?

Username: ejpwolfpackejpwolfpack

Date posted: 9d ago

@Anxiousaddie To share a little bit, SOOCD started when I was 17, I’m 20 years old now, it changed my life alot. I used to be very confident in who I was. I was girl crazy, and I was set to go play division 1 football. My life was panning out to be exciting. Stuff got bad with SOOCD and it ultimately lead to me not playing college football anymore. If you want to just reach out me any socials Id be more then happy to share the details of my story with you. I can talk on Insta or facebook. id love to hear yours as well. Or if you just wanna talk on here thats fine, I just find it easier to talk on actual chats not a comment sections haha but whatever your comfortable with. I’ve just been trying to connect with people that deal with my specific subtype. About Chrissie, She’s just been great in my journey. One on one calls, her community, YouTube vids. Highly recommend her

Username: AnxiousaddieAnxiousaddie

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 3d ago

@ejpwolfpack thanks for the reply, it's a very hard theme to deal with. What's your Instagram?

Username: ejpwolfpackejpwolfpack

Date posted: 3d ago

@Anxiousaddie ethan.presutty

Username: kreliakrelia

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 14d ago

Hi! I know this can be really scary and I’m sorry you’re going through this. There are times where thoughts can feel so real especially when you are on the road to recovery. I’ve had thoughts like that and it’s so uncomfortable. For ERP sometimes I will listen to music like Chappel Roan (sorry I suck at spelling her name) is a big one. Whenever I’m scrolling and get triggered by something I take a moment (because sometimes I scroll past out of habit) and then I go right back to what triggered me and sit with it. I hope this helps in any way

Username: AnxiousaddieAnxiousaddie

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 14d ago

@krelia Thanks, its so hard because it REALLY felt true. It came during my erp and it felt like yeah that’s what I want and I didn’t feel anxious, just after :(

Username: pureolifepureolife

Date posted: 14d ago

Ocd is more than intrusive thoughts: it’s also intrusive images and sensations and feelings. You say you were doing ERP but you forgot the most important part: response prevention. So you really didn’t do ERP. When we do erp, intrusive thoughts are going to pop up. That’s part of it! The exercise is to learn to tolerate that distress. And to not analyze, argue with, or negate them. I am not at all surprised that during this exercise your ocd gave you a brief sensation of calm. Anxiety is how you’ve been able to justify that it’s “not real.” So ocd upped its game and sent you calm. And now you’re spiraling. Ocd is smart! Do the exercise again. And if calm or acceptance or whatever feeling arises, just let it be there and keep going with the exercise. Afterwords, go about your day. Don’t dwell and analyze and check and recheck the memory of it. Do this for a few days. I bet you learn to see through the lies.

Username: ninkaninga

Date posted: 24w ago

Its so scary

I have no idea if this is just OCD and I’m actually just straight or i was in denial my whole life. Now it feels so scary, i feel like im realizing my true self, that ive always been gay, that im just using SO-OCD as a cover up. IT FEELS SO REAL. I even feel like others with SO-OCD dont experience this feeling and i must experience something different. Its literally a feeling like an urge to admit myself that I’m gay and it even feels like i know im gay and i was using OCD as a cover up for 6 years. I cant even describe that feeling. When i try to imagine myself with a girl in my mind it makes me feel like i like that thought like i want it😔 It feels all very very real. I think you guys with SOOCD have different feelings and you actually have OCD. I dont want these thoughts. I dont want to be gay, i dont want to feel this. But maybe i was my whole life in denial. 😭😭

Username: DarknessWingman

Date posted: 19w ago

Doing ERP wrong

So i don't have access to an OCD psychologist and I really wanted to try ERP so I tried it on my own, but to be honest it made me feel sometimes worse. The only exercise I was doing was the look into a mirror and say "You might be gay, you might be bi, you might be straight it does not mather" I did it like 3 times per day. After some time I started having stronger compulsions and had a small amount of time where i was at my worse (even doing self harm) thinking I was just gay and should just acept it and that by saying it i was just acepting it. Do you think i did something wrong?

Username: Eileen03

Date posted: 15w ago

Real and not ocd

18+ I really feel that something I did was real and not ocd because I remember liking it and wanting it but afterwards feeling awful, I don’t know how to move on from this

POCD

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