Existential crisis

Does anyone had or have the existential fear of our brain functions. I have so much hyperawareness in my thoughts, I focus all the time in my feelings and my intentions in order to check if I am strange or not and if I have control of my actions. I do psychotherapy 4 years and I thought I was fine. But this June I had a derealization episode(or ocd) , after that a depersonalization episode (or ocd) and after that I have obsessions about our existence and that every aspect in our lives has to do with our brain and for some reason these thoughts scary me. I know that at some point is ocd but I am very confused why this thoughts scary me so much. I observe others and I am curious how it's possible not to think about that and this make it worse . I am so anxious because obviously we are our brain ,I know that and brain has to do with everything,but I don't know why it make me anxious and if it's possible to live without these thoughts. I do many compulsion but my biggest is to figure out if I have compulsion in order to figure out if my thoughts is ocd or delusions. It's so real and these thoughts really bother me. Any other with same experience?

As the title states, my intrusive thought of "being in a dream" when I'm conscious is horrible tonight. Constant need of reassurance, trying to find any distraction. I can't get this thought out of my head no matter what I do. It's on the top of my thinking list 24/7 no matter what I try. Im feeling bad derealization and it makes me want to wish I didn't exist..I was fine before my panic attack from an ocular migraine (losing my eyesight is my biggest fear)...but now I'm not living...I'm just surviving...I'm very depressed...I haven't eaten today and had to remind myself to take a shower, brush my teeth, and drink water. I have a therapy session on here tomorrow...I'm praying so hard that I get answers and ways to get rid of this stupid thought that appeared out of nowhere....

I have powerful existential ocd. My current most distressing spike ever has me almost convinced that me and my son were sucked into a virtual reality in my phone or another dimension like a mirror or tv, and that this reality is all fake and I've separated him from the real world. All because I had a guilt thought nearly two months ago. On top of that, my partner let me know she's dating another man two weeks ago and I was just laid off today. I need kind souls that understand and some empathy. Thank you.