The life cycle of a False Memory spike

Just reflecting on one of the more tricky tactics OCD can throw at us. And that is the False Memory. If you've had it, you know how badly it can suck...especially if you're like me and already have a somewhat poor memory. The life cycle seems to be (for me) 1.) Random what if thought...either completely random or somehow tied to a theme you're currently struggling with. 2) trying to rationalize..."I would never actually do something like that" "doesn't sound like me" or "I'd definitely remember if I did that...no way I'd forget that" 3) building feelings of anxiety coupled with thoughts of "what if you did actually do that...why would you be feeling this building dread if you didnt...there has to be something here" 4) vague feelings of maybe having consciously repressing the memory. Vague feelings of starting to recall it happening usually coupled with imagining the situation. 5) the imagined scenarios you've pictured begin to feel like they could be real...slowly they begin to feel more and more real despite some small part of you knowing what you're allowing OCD to do. 6) boom...you know somewhere in you that this can't really be true but it's starting to feel so real. You start feeling shame, guilt, panic, fear, dread, depression...the guilt is growing. Who even are you? 7) ruminations for days. 8) you're starting to work on it. Do the necessary work. Accepting the uncertainty. Entertaining the possibility while also acknowledging that maybe this is still just OCD 9) the feelings are starting to lessen, but that feeling of doubt is still there begging you to come back and revisit it. You have to make sure! You don't know how to make sure as you literally have no real memory of it. Which also feeds the loop sort of. The lack of memory is just as much frightening as it I'd somewhat reassuring 10) you're finally starting to come down. You're still feeling residual fear/guilt/shame/whatever...but you're also starting to realize how silly all this was. You bounce back and forth between feelings of relief and realization that youre being crazy and feelings doubt and fear. 11) eventually you're ready to move onto the next thing OCD is gonna throw at you.