Welcome to
the NOCD Community

Is distracting yourself with social media a compulsion when you experience anxiety

My daughter has ocd, what can I say or do to help her? I know nothing about this🙁 She’s in her young 20s. She didnt get a lot of help from the counselor she saw her whole life when she was a kid. So many things are going wrong for her right now, i worry☹️. Thank you sincerely to anyone that answers 🙏🏻

I’ve been thinking about becoming a Christian. I’m not trying to force myself to believe in god. But after I read people’s experiences on becoming a Christian. Their lives improved a lot. I just wanted a peaceful life. Can anyone share your experience of being an atheist, then becoming a Christian?

For weeks now I’ve been getting stuck in a cycle of intrusive thoughts of my friends being in danger, in one way or another. Then texting or calling said person for reassurance, not being pleased with the response, asking questions persistently until they get angry and tell me to leave them alone then I start compulsively apologizing, then if they accept the apology I go back to the intrusive thoughts of them in danger and if not I start feeling like I’m not being understood and ranting at them about how I’m feeling and just compounding their anger. None of my friends are speaking to me right now, my best friend blocked my number and I think she’s done with me permanently and not sure about the others either. This has been a problem for years but three weeks ago I had a close friend lie to me about having tried to kill herself, and I’m not sure why she’s so such a thing. It seems to have been intentionally to hurt me and since then she has not spoken to me and I carried this frustration into my other friendships and let my OCD latch on to it and tell me she is dead and all my other will be soon, and that it’s my fault for not understanding that my friends false suicide attempt confession was a warning of what was to come and not chasing after her when she distanced herself and now the urge to seek reassurance in my other relationships is turned up to 11. I’m so afraid I’m going to be all alone now and it’s paradoxically making me want to start pestering them again and circumventing their efforts to block my number and social media accounts. I know this isn’t okay to do but it almost doesn’t feel like a voluntary action anymore I feel as though I can’t resist. That’s an incorrect feeling because I am currently resisting but I’m not doing well at it. It’s utterly horrifying to know you are destroying all of your relationships and understanding how you are destroying them and simultaneously feel as if doing that thing is the only option you have. I’m no stranger to this feeling, it comes and goes all the time, but for hours or days not weeks like this time. I feel as though my sanity is wearing very thin. I have no idea what to do to make it stop. I can manage a minute or few at a time of relief but those breaks are getting fewer and further between as the days go on. If any of these friends decide to try to work this out while I’m still in this episode I feel pretty confident that I will destroy what is left of them because I can’t not over analyze every word that they say at this point and ruminate on it until I’m convinced I have discovered some anomaly in what they are saying that convinces me they are in danger.

[I take 10mg Lexapro] I have a reaccuring issue and I’m trying to determine as to whether it’s caused by my meds. Everyday, I constantly sweat. The only time that I am not sweating is when I am in front of a fan (which I now have on whenever I’m sat at home) I don’t mean a little bit of underarm sweat, I mean to the point my T-shirt is dripping, by back is coated and even my legs. It’s so embarrassing because I can’t explain to anyone why I have drips of sweat coming off of me and I’m constantly wiping myself down and spraying because I’m scared of smelling. Is this caused by meds? Or possibly a different issue?

I want to tell my boyfriend that I struggle with OCD, he knows about my anxiety to an extent but not the OCD. Things are getting serious between us and I feel like I ought to tell him about this part of me too. How have any of you handled telling those close to you about your OCD? Any tips would be greatly appreciated.

Having a really bad flare up and having intrusive thoughts over my real event from when I was a child (10/11) I feel like I’m a horrible monster and that I don’t deserve to live. I haven’t had distressing thoughts over this event as bad as I am rn in a few months but my mind is just running rampant and I feel like I’m gonna go to jail and that I’m a horrible person. I never had bad intentions at the time but looking back as an adult i feel like a monster. Not only do I have real event ocd with this event but also really struggle with false memory ocd and everything gets so jumbled and I’m so terrified that I’m actually a horrible monster and that I’m going to go to jail and that my life is over. I hate this and hate these thoughts and I wish they would stop

When someone is consumed with obsessions and compulsions, it can leave them exhausted and drained. It might be difficult to maintain important relationships, engage in social activities, or perform their job duties. But, since they are constantly dealing with fears and anxiety, they might find that further isolating themselves to avoid triggers seems like the safer bet. While it can lead to temporary relief, this avoidance only worsens symptoms long-term, and will often heighten one’s sense of loneliness. Fears of being misunderstood due to stigma can also make it hard for some to reach out to family and friends, keeping them further isolated. That’s why it’s vital to remember that you are not alone. Finding a community of others with shared experiences and connecting with a specialist who deeply understands OCD are some ways you can bring a sense of belonging and hope back into your life. NOCD Therapist Stacy Quick, LPC, shares more about how OCD can heighten feelings of isolation, and ways to bring back a sense of hope.

My partner and I have been through a lot through our relationship. A lot of the issues we have are my fault. I wasn’t honest with him at the start about things from my past because I myself wasn’t sure if things were correct and I was ashamed of my past. However I did tell him everything and then that lead to me feeling as though I have to confess everything even the unimportant stuff. I felt as though confession was a compulsion and that it was something I had to do to relieve these feelings of anxiety. This created a lot of issues as my partner didn’t want to be constantly reminded of things from my past which I totally understand. Things had seemed to be getting better as I had gotten out of this habit. But for the past month now I’ve been having intrusive thoughts/images regarding sexually inappropriate things or people from my past that I don’t care about or want to think about. I’ve tried so many things to try and stop these as it’s taking a toll on me, my partner and our relationship. I’m not sure how to stop it or if I even can. It just feels like my mind is always busy and I can never relax. I can see my partner getting upset and insecure because of the thoughts which I completely understand. And I hate having to tell him I’ve had these thoughts as he wants to know. But he tells me I ruin things a lot which I get I do as I can’t help the thoughts and I tell him about them. I just want it to stop and I’ve tried going through with therapy but it’s a bit of a tough situation at the moment with money and waitlists and stuff. My boyfriend isn’t comfortable with me going through ERP which I understand completely. I don’t want to do anything anymore I feel stuck. All I want to do is sleep because I know that nothing too bad can happen then. I get stressed whenever I wake up because I don’t want the thoughts to flood my head again. I just don’t know what else to do to help this or to stop my intrusive mental images. I feel helpless and I’m not entirely sure what to do. I love my boyfriend so much and I never want to hurt him. I know it’s selfish to ask him to stay with me but I just can’t bear the thought of losing him, especially because of this.

Hi! I’m queer and have known since I was a teen. I identify as pansexual. But have had periods of obsessions about if I am wrong about the specific label. Like I know I like everyone and am attracted to all genders. But with the discourse within the queer community, I get anxious that maybe i my identify is hurtful for others. Basically I’m obsess over if I am pan or bi. Or if saying I’m pan is bi erasure. Or if I can say I’m both. But I haven’t before and would that be going back on my word. And I felt pan was the right label for me when I was coming out and it felt right but what if people see me as just trying to be an “edgy bi”. I don’t know. I get wrapped up into. Even though my girlfriend is bi and we have solidarity with each other and support each other, the lgbtq+ internal discourse can be me anxious. So much so that I have stopped saying pan and say queer instead mostly. I do identify as queer also but I just worry that then I am letting know pan folk but not being visible. I think it’s a part of my morality ocd/ harm ocd about being a good person and not hurting anyone. I was wondering if anyone else with sexuality themes also experienced this sort of thing because I haven’t seen it talked about before?

Does anyone have thoughts they’ve cheated on their significant other but have no thought of names or anything it could be or have any type of proof? I mess up and go back and reassure myself and look at past pictures and stuff to make myself feel better and prove I haven’t but it don’t help

Today is my girlfriend and I’s 8 year anniversary. We’ve been together since I was 16. So romantic right? Except that I’m already messing it up. I’ve already cried about my event and my fear of not confessing everything to her. It’s only 11:45. I feel so awful, why can’t I just let her have a nice day? I’m afraid if she knew or wanted to know more details, we wouldn’t be celebrating 8 beautiful years… How do you go about life not feeling like your hiding or lying when you’ve done something bad your loved one doesn’t want to know everything about? How do I stop feeling like a fraud? I’m sorry for posting here so much, I am just very stuck. My gf says moving forward is the right thing, but doing that without disclosing every detail of my event (that effects her) feels so so wrong. I’m afraid of rugsweeping. Idk why I can’t just put these thoughts off till later and enjoy our anniversary. I think I’m actually extra triggering BECAUSE it’s our anniversary. I can’t believe that despite everything, this beautiful person has given me 8 whole years of her precious life. It moves me greatly, but also fills me with fear that she’s wasting her life on me, her youth. I will try to give her everything good I possibly can today.

I've recently been dating this guy I have fancied for the longest time. I started are relationship off and asked him for his number and I was so excited. We went on our first date and I have never been so happy during and after it. After our 3rd occasion seeing each other I started to have little doubts in the back of my mind and straight away I knew that it was my ocd side of my brain wanting me to worry and wanting me to doubt everything but now it's starting to make me a little bit numb towards him and making me believe that I don't like him and what if I don't!!!!! I've had no reason not to change my mind on him so I don't know what's going on! When I'm with him I wonder if I'm being my true self and something checking my mind but I'm so much better with him it's just as soon as we aren't together and we have to text. What shall i do? What helps this? I really liked him and in literally a day my mind is spinning it but making it so believable. Is it normal to sometimes wish they could call things off so it would be easier for you to give into your mind???!!! Please send advice or ever just reassurance.

The surprising symptoms of depression, a.k.a. anger and irritability, is a huge talking point in the psych fields. And I see this topic often on here when people say that they anger easily, they are often irritated by others, or by themselves. That is a symptom of depression and therapy in a nutshell just released a fantastic rundown of this symptom of depression and what to do. LINK: https://youtu.be/-zuf5E7icoI?feature=shared

Hello everyone, I wanted to share something that for me felt like a step towards searching and finding healing on this OCD I suffer from. The day before yesterday after I got very disappointed and hurt both my mom and my husband (by very ugly things they said to me). I went to bed thinking: "I can't let myself to fall apart", it feels no one understands me, they don't take me seriously, they just ignore me (specially my husband), so I thought I will then trust in myself I will be more compassionate and kind to myself, for me and my daughter. So yesterday, when I woke up, every morning when I'm up, before I dare to touch my little toddler, I must wash my hands at least 7 times, so yesterday I did just 1. Almost immediately after it came to my mind that thought who always makes me doubt if I did or not something, if I did good or not, if I did it good enough or not, something like this: " have you washed your hands enough?" Theb I answered to myself inside my mind YES I HAVE! Then almost instantly another thought, "what IF you didn't do it good enough?" (Wash my hands) I again told to myself, OH YES! I DID IT ENOUGH, IF I DIDNT THEN, WE WILL SEE WHAT MAY HAPPEN. Almost immediately the anxiety reduced so much that I got like a sudden feeling of happiness and relief. I also didn't do all the rituals with cleaning before i can offer food to my daughter. Then I did something bigger I decided to go out and take a walk with my baby, even if very scared about dust and dirty streets because they are building something in my block so it looks not so nice, I also fear a lot the bird droppings since I read for 2 months ago there's bird influenza in many lasts in Europe including Sweden (where I live) but just in wild gulls, and other birds, so I'm very scared to walk close to those, it's hard not to do so. Still after all, I went out I didn't feel super good I could feel strange smells in the ambient, feeling threatened by possible contamination agents, but still ai stayed out longer than I expected, because my girl looked so happy. I even dare to pass by the daycare and talk to a teacher about taking my daughter there as soon as we make the application. It stills scares me to be close to people because I fear they will sneeze or cough on my face. Obviously I came home and took a shower and give one to my girl also. But I made it! 🎊🙏🏼🥺🥺👏👏✨️👍my husband didn't congratulate me anything, didn't recognize my effort, I felt very sad, I cried, but after all, I didn't care, because I'm doing this for me and my daughter. If some other people doesn't cheer up and congratulates me because they think it's absurd or stupid, I don't care, they don't know and clearly don't want to know or learn about contamination abd health concerns OCD. All the best for you all, specially for those beautiful and sweet people here who has been so kind to me🥺😍✨️👍😍❤️💖💕🩷😭

A Message For Highly Sensitive People Like My Self🙏🏼🫶🏼🏡🥺 Providing resources to those who need❤️‍🩹 A highly sensitive person (HSP) is a neurodivergent individual who is thought to have an increased or deeper central nervous system sensitivity to physical, emotional, or social stimuli. Some refer to this as having sensory processing sensitivity, SPS. While highly sensitive people are sometimes negatively described as being “too sensitive," it is a personality trait that brings both strengths and challenges. How Do You Know If You're an HSP Have you ever been told that you’re “too sensitive” or that you “shouldn’t think so much,” particularly by people who strike you as too insensitive or who you believe should think a little more? It is important to remember that there is no official highly sensitive person diagnosis, and being an HSP does not mean that you have a mental illness. High sensitivity is a personality trait that involves increased responsiveness to both positive and negative influences. High sensitivity applies across a few different categories. There are several traits or characteristics common to HSPs, according to the researchers who identified this personality trait: • Avoiding violent movies or TV shows because they feel too intense and leave you feeling unsettled • Being deeply moved by beauty, either expressed in art, nature, or the human spirit, or sometimes even a good commercial • Being overwhelmed by sensory stimuli like noisy crowds, bright lights, or uncomfortable clothing • Feeling a need for downtime (not just a preference), especially when you have hectic days; needing to retreat to a dark, quiet room • Having a rich and complex inner life, complete with deep thoughts and strong feelings that go with them It is less common to be a highly sensitive person, and society tends to be built around people who notice a little less and are affected a little less deeply. Highly sensitive people may benefit from finding ways to cope with the stresses they often face. This is true for those who recognize themselves as highly sensitive as well as those who have a loved one who is more sensitive than the average person. What Causes High Sensitivity? What makes a person highly sensitive likely depends on a variety of factors such as evolution, environment, genetics, and early childhood experiences. High sensitivity exists in at least 100 other species aside from humans. Research suggests that high sensitivity is an evolutionary trait that increases the likelihood of survival because HSPs are on the lookout for potential predators or dangerous situations. Of course, constantly being on guard when there aren't any immediate threats often results in anxiety. Research also shows that a lack of parental warmth growing up may cause a child to develop high sensitivity and carry this trait into adulthood. The same goes for negative early childhood experiences. If you experienced trauma as a child, you may be more likely to become an HSP as an adult. Genetics may contribute to high sensitivity. Specifically, the dopamine system may play a role. It affects personality and may make some people more prone than others to becoming highly sensitive. High sensitivity is also hereditary. Similar Conditions and Traits People often confuse high sensitivity with other personality traits or mental health conditions. Introversion: Both highly sensitive people and introverts can become overwhelmed when faced with too many stimuli. But introverts are overwhelmed specifically by social stimuli, like large crowds or parties. HSPs can become overwhelmed by social stimuli too; however, HSPs are sensitive to all different types of sensory stimuli, such as bright lights and loud music. Sensory processing disorder (SPD): It's true that someone with SPD and someone who is highly sensitive can be averse to sensory input. The difference is that SPD can cause decreased motor function, which is not a characteristic of HSPs. In addition, SPD can cause under-responsiveness to sensory stimuli, whereas it's characteristic of HSPs to over-respond. Autism: High sensitivity is not a form of autism. Again, while HSPs are overwhelmed by sensory information, individuals with autism may experience either hypersensitivity or hyposensitivity (under-responsiveness) to sensory information. Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD): HSPs may also be mistaken as having attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). While both HSPs and people with ADHD exhibit over-responsiveness to stimuli, people with ADHD also exhibit cognitive symptoms that HSPs do not such as difficulty focusing or paying attention. Impact of Being an HSP Being an HSP comes with both advantages and challenges. It is possible to be too easily offended by people who mean no harm or who are trying their best to be kind. It is also possible to overreact to daily stressors or relationship issues, particularly if you become emotionally aggressive as a response. However, being an HSP doesn’t necessarily mean that you imagine negative motives when they are not there. It is more that you perceive them more easily. Or, you may be affected more deeply by negative experiences, which is not necessarily a weakness. Some of the ways that being an HSP might impact your life include: • You might avoid situations that leave you feeling overwhelmed. Highly sensitive people may be more affected by certain situations such as tension, violence, and conflict, which may lead them to avoid things that make them feel uncomfortable. • You might be highly touched by beauty or emotionality. Highly sensitive people tend to feel deeply moved by the beauty they see around them. They may cry while watching particularly heartwarming videos. • You may have close relationships with others. HSPs care deeply about their friends and tend to form deep bonds with people. Again, the empathy that a highly sensitive person brings to the table is a powerful tool for being a supportive friend and loved one. • You may be grateful for the life you have. Highly sensitive people appreciate a fine wine, a good meal, or a beautiful song on a level that most people can't access. They may feel more existential angst, but they also may feel more gratitude for what they have in life, knowing that it is possibly fleeting and nothing is certain. A major benefit of being an HSP is the ability to empathize. Empathy is a tool that can promote strong relationships and a deeply fulfilling emotional life. Of course, it's important to differentiate between your feelings and others' feelings. For HSPs, lows may be lower, but highs have the potential to be higher as well. If you know how to manage the unique features of being an HSP, you can make it more of a strength and less of a challenge in your life. To do this, it helps to understand what you’re dealing with, whether you are doing this for yourself or trying to build a deeper understanding of someone in your life who may be highly sensitive. Potential Pitfalls Not surprisingly, highly sensitive people tend to get more stressed when faced with difficult situations. They may also be stressed by things that may roll off of other people’s backs. Social stress is perceived as more taxing to most people than other types of stress. This kind of stress can be particularly difficult for someone who can perceive many different ways that things could go wrong in a conflict, for example, or can perceive hostility or tension where others may not notice it. Specific things that can be significantly stressful for the highly sensitive include: Hectic Schedules Not everyone loves being too busy, but some people thrive on the excitement and exhilaration of a busy life. HPSs, on the other hand, feel overwhelmed and rattled when they have a lot to do in a short amount of time, even if they technically have enough time to get everything done if they rush. The need to juggle the uncertainty of maybe not being able to make it all work and the pressure of such situations feels overwhelmingly stressful. Expectations of Others Highly sensitive people tend to pick up on the needs and feelings of others. They hate letting people down. Learning to say no is a challenge and a necessity for HSPs because they can feel crushed by the demands of others, particularly because they can feel their friends’ disappointment if HSPs need to say no. Highly sensitive people tend to be their own worst critics. They feel responsible for the happiness of others, or at least acutely aware of it when there are negative emotions floating around. Coping With Stress As an HSP Finding ways to cope with life's stress can be particularly helpful if you tend to have a more sensitive personality. Much of your stress relief plan as a highly sensitive person can involve insulating yourself from too many stimuli. Put a barrier between you and sensory stimuli that feel overwhelming. Know what triggers stress in you, and learn to avoid these things. Add positivity by creating positive experiences in your schedule to insulate you from additional stress you may encounter. Avoid stressors like slasher movies and people who sap your positive energy, make heavy demands on you, or make you feel bad about yourself. Learn to say no to overwhelming demands and feel OK with it, and create a perimeter in your life. Set up a safe space. Let your home be a soothing environment. A Word From Verywell Being a highly sensitive person means you are more likely to feel things deeply, whether those things are positive or negative. While the highs can be joyous, the lows can present challenges that can affect your stress levels, relationships, and ability to cope. Make a plan for how you will manage your feelings in difficult situations to ensure that you don't become overwhelmed. Resource- https://www.verywellmind.com/highly-sensitive-persons-traits-that-create-more-stress-4126393 https://megaphone.link/MERE3123703239 ☝🏼 ☝🏼 Hosted by therapist Amy Morin, LCSW, this episode of The Verywell Mind Podcast shares how to stay mentally strong when you're dealing with negative emotions.

I can’t hold down friends because I’m sure they think I’m creepy. I can work with people but it’s hard for me to still be friends with them afterwards. I treat people better if I work with them but then I get worried outside of work and I don’t know how to act. It’s hard for me to talk to strangers let alone hold a decent conversation. I keep getting in my head. I don’t give off nice person vibes. I am positive I give off creepy vibes. I’ll never have a boyfriend. I’ll never keep friends. I lost all of them because of my bad attitude. Idk how to change. I’m stuck in a pattern of hating myself it won’t let me have friends of boyfriends. I’m sick of myself. I’ll never have friends outside of my family.

I’m genuinely scared to even start my career and get a girlfriend all I want is a girlfriend And to be free of HOCD and a happy life, I can’t sleep right without having this in my mind at all times, no matter what, but I feel like I am trapped and can never get better ever I cannot fucking stand this can anybody explain their symptoms

So I’ve heard that people with ocd are more prone to becoming obsessed with a person and it becomes a ocd cycle. And I’m struggling with that right now. I’ve made a best friend at the beginning of this year (long distance and we met online) we bonded over a mutual love for a band (who we also have crushes on). Our friendship became more than just that mutual interest and we are super close now. We talked literally everyday since we met. I met her in person one time. But for the past couple of months I’ve been struggling with jealousy towards her and her other friendships. I’ve talked to her about this plenty of times and I’ve almost ended our friendship because of it. She’s extremely special to me and I question if it’s a reciprocated feeling. She’s reassured me that I am important to her and I’m one of her best friends. I do question it often but I force myself to not let it get the best of me and not seek that reassurance from her. But recently I’ve started to question my own feelings. Why am I so jealous of her other friendships? Why do I think about her all the time? Why do I constantly want to do things for her and make her happy? Is it because I like her more than a friend? There is so much more to the story I could go on about. So it’s made me question myself so much. I’ve always liked guys. I do think girls are attractive but I couldn’t picture myself in a relationship with a girl. I did once a LONG time ago. But I can’t get her off my mind. And I’m not worried about if I did like girls. I wouldn’t care. What I am worried about is if this feeling and thoughts about her are real or if she’s just become an obsession with my ocd. Or maybe even an anxious attachment. I have another best friend and I love her very much but not this intensely. I’m just scared of what’s real. Do I like her? Or am I just “crazy”. What’s real anymore. Please give me some advice or second opinions.🙏🏼 or if I could go more in detail and text someone personally who’s willing to listen.

Why are some days where OCD is intense and them there's other days where it isn't, like cmon man, just don't be intense for me forever 😭