Not OCD related/familial dysfunction and grief

@"Book-em Dano" Thanks so much! It’s very hard. It’s been a grief Ive carried since a child. But God is good and what was meant for bad He meant for good. What steps did you and your wife take to “untangle” it? I don’t want to bring it in to my marriage and repeat the past.

Scripture says that a man leaves his father and mother and cleaves to his wife, and they become one flesh. There is certainly a transition into this, where you and your spouse become each other's immediate family, while previous immediate family becomes extended family. So learn to protect each other. One bit of advice I was given.... "There will be times when you will need to side with your wife against your family even if your wife is wrong. If your wife is wrong, then you and her can talk it out later, and settle it later. But you will need to protect her." Between you two.... Fights will happen, be they don't automatically mean that you're marriage is unhealthy. You two will sharpen each other. Don't be afraid to make mistakes, because they are opportunities to learn. Learn to give each other the benefit of the doubt, but don't shy away from being honest if something is wrong. Be willing to listen, and learn to be slow to defend or justify yourself. As you two practice this, you will sharpen each other and grow together.