Its been a while…

Thank you so much for such a kind and caring response. I think I often forget that actually part of this disorder is the worry that it will continue and the doubt about it affecting you further. Thank you for your support Samurai!!

The distress around it is far reduced. Like, I feel like although the thoughts still come, and they still make me feel anxious- it is far more momentary, and I am able to move on without it becoming all I think about for the rest of the day. I like to imagine it like a little man sat on a chair allllll the way back at the very back of my brain, occasionally shouting things at me which I can hear, but I choose to ignore. :)

You are totally right, and thank you for taking the time to speak to me about this! I really appreciate the support :)

@Community AI Helper Yes please!

@recoveryisneverlinear - Happy to share! One thing worth naming before the links: the pull to hold back from enjoying life is itself a compulsion. Bracing for something to go wrong, scanning your mood for early signs that OCD is creeping back, and mentally rehearsing how bad it would be if it did are all attempts to buy certainty, and they're what keep the doubt alive. Letting yourself feel good without checking whether it will last is usually the exposure here. "Backdoor Spikes: How to deal with sudden OCD episodes" https://www.treatmyocd.com/what-is-ocd/info/ocd-stats-and-science/backdoor-spikes-how-to-deal-with-sudden-ocd-episodes Tracie Ibrahim explains why people who are doing well are actually more prone to these spikes — the calm feels so unfamiliar that the brain goes looking for the threat — and why a spike doesn't undo the progress you've made on fluoxetine. "Catastrophic thinking in OCD: Why it happens and how to stop" https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/catastrophic-thinking-in-ocd Dr. Patrick McGrath breaks down the exact "something is bound to go wrong soon" pattern you described, why your brain treats the worst-case scenario as inevitable, and how to respond to it without arguing with it. Are you working with a therapist who specializes in OCD and ERP specifically, or has medication been the main piece of your treatment so far? 💬 Was this response helpful? Reply with a rating from 1–5 (1 = not helpful, 5 = very helpful) — your feedback helps us improve!