ROCD

I just feel so guilty and ashamed that I stayed friends/continued hanging around/wanted to still hang around someone I had kissed a few times and hungout with right before dating my partner. I would’ve hated if my partner did this. But I know we are different people but still. I have terrible ROCD. I love my partner and will never think I’m deserving of him. I feel I should apologize out of the blue for this. I feel sick all the time I’m sick of feeling this way. I can’t imagine how this wouldn’t look so bad to my partner …. and that brings me into another terrifying thought wow did I like this other person? ugh

recoveryisne...

Date posted: Yesterday

I have stayed friends with lots of people I have a romantic history with. I don't think its bad at all! In my friend group, lots of us have a romantic history with each other, but feelings change. You don't like them romantically anymore or you wouldn't be worried about them this much. Remind yourself that OCD will always target what matters to you most, and in this case that is what your partner thinks of you/ making sure you don't cross boundaries they wouldn't like. I would also like to say that the right person should trust you enough to know that you would not cross those boundaries and should not project insecurities about you being friends with people you have had romantic interactions with! This may not apply as we do not know about your scenario/ dynamic with your partner.

Mk3

Date posted: Yesterday

@recoveryisneverlinear @recoveryisneverlinear Thank you so much for your support. I’ve always had the worry that by going to this bar that I knew this other person would be at was so horribly wrong of me. And I feel so guilty for doing that. And I have always worried it meant I liked that other person. But like you said I wouldn’t be this worried lol! And it’s been a while since I went to the bar for this reason I think. But I think I’ve always been this worried about this similar topic. Because I’ve had this much worry and ROCD since the start of my relationship! But of course now my brain is asking “was I worried at the time I seeked him out at the bar?” Or whatever ugh… maybe not in the moment but I know I’ve always had this worry in some form. And the other guy still texted me at times and I would answer and I pray I didn’t cross a line by doing so. I don’t think I would’ve had bad intentions!

ben123

Date posted: Yesterday

I’m in a horrible ROCD spike too, mine takes the form of confessing and I am not going to confess. The anxiety and feeling of being wrong is overwhelming but I am sticking to it

CatGee

Date posted: Yesterday

@ben123 Yesssss👏

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