I was just like, playing Roblox, and I hid in the same corner as this guy with a skin all in the color of his skin, and he left, but then he came back and seemed like he was harassing me, like, walking back and forth, but I'm pretty sure he wanted me to get out because I left and he just went back to the corner, but OCD is telling me someone harassed me in the game and it's making me nervous.
I think I should definitely delete Roblox it’s triggering me I’m feeling weird about it because why would I check to see if they’re male and get a sense of happiness or would want to interact with males or like if they friend me it feels like I would get their number or if I friended them this sounds like P*do I don’t know their age but still Roblox is for kids so I assume they are and I’m being a p for wanting to play with little boys or messing around with them I’m scared that this will definitely make me a p**dator in the future I think I need to delete the app I don’t want exposure from it anymore
I feel like a p because my little brother was telling his friend that I had a hand a game called slap battles and I was happy to join the game it’s like why do I feel happy because of that I remember I use to help people get badges for the game and this one kid who I would always help and I would join to play with him and he was telling me he’s from this country and he was 8 or something and I feel like a p because of that thank God he unfriend me because till this day I think about it and if he was still my friend I don’t think I would sleep at night thinking if I said or did something wrong in the game Like he asked one day how old I was and I didn’t want to tell him but I think back at it and I’m just like did I not want to tell him because I wanted to do something or I didn’t tell him because I wanted to fit in? I feel so bad when my brother friends friended me and I don’t friend them back because I know what rejection is like and I’m not trying to be mean but I just won’t sleep at night thinking about if I did something I just get upset It’s so upsetting and it makes me want to cry
My OCD is playing whack a mole but I can’t even tell if it’s OCD anymore or if I’m just a horrible person. I made a joke when my friend mentioned a video game and I replied “gooner game” and then went “just kidding” (me and one of my friends in that group typically joke like this) My other friend said “eww” and started laughing, and even if the vibes were lighthearted I now I feel like I’m a weird creep. I’m worried I should have kept my mouth shut bc the other friend is younger than me (they’re not a minor). And even then, I feel like I still majorly overstepped and feel gross. Esp because im the oldest of the group and I should be leading by example. I’m so grossed out at myself for saying such an awful thing. I’m spiraling yet again. Ugh
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