Health Anxiety

Hey! I’m new to all of this. I’ve been diagnosed with OCD since I was 10 years old, I’m 22 now. It’s had its ups and downs, but this year it has gotten worse since my mom was diagnosed with terminal brain cancer. They said it’s not hereditary…but it activated my health anxiety. I’ve worried about every cancer in the book. I’ve had blood work done 10 times this year, hormones ran, autoimmune disease panel, mri of my knee, colonoscopy, head to toe ct scan, inward ultrasound, 4-5 clinical breast exams…it’s been nuts. I stop worrying about one worry and I move on to another. I’ve been trying so hard to stay afloat, but I’m struggling. I just had a clinical breast exam two weeks ago, they said everything was good, which is awesome. However, my OCD has convinced me that I have a lump again. I know realistically they said there is nothing there, but I’m having a hard time convincing my mind. Has anything helped anyone retraining their mind or maybe stopping compulsions of constantly checking?

WilliamL

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 8w

Hey, I really relate to what you’re going through. I also struggle with health OCD, and it’s absolutely terrifying at times. I know how convincing the thoughts can feel, like you have to get checked “just one more time.” But I’ve learned that the medical system can’t give us the certainty our OCD demands. Every time you go for a scan or test, the relief is only temporary, then the anxiety comes back stronger. I’ve been there too. The truth is, freedom doesn’t come from chasing certainty. It comes from learning to live with uncertainty. Even doctors can’t give 100% guarantees, and in life there are always risks and whether it’s a health condition, or something random like an accident. The “what ifs” never end. I’m 26 and I’ve thought I had colon cancer, brain cancer, breast cancer, ALS, lymphoma, melanoma, even diabetes all within a few months. It’s hell. But the turning point for me was realizing that checking, Googling, and reassurance only fed the cycle. It kept me stuck. It’s not easy, but the only real way forward is resisting those compulsions and letting the thoughts be there without acting on them. That’s how the brain eventually learns it doesn’t need to panic. You can retrain your mind. Therapy (especially ERP for OCD) has been a huge help for me, along with practicing sitting with uncertainty. You’re not alone in this. It feels impossible some days, but it is possible to break the cycle. You’re stronger than your OCD wants you to believe. Breaking the cycle doesn’t have to be big. If you can stop Googling or using ChatGPT for 5 or 30 minutes is huge. Or even not seeing the doctor the one day when your OCD is telling you to. Make the doctors appointment and then cancel it. You will truly know when something is wrong with your body. :)

Jaclip

Date posted: 8w

@WilliamL Wow! I really love your comments. It’s where I wanna be! It feels far away from where I stand today. But there’s hope. Thanks

Kelfanni

Date posted: 8w

I’m so sorry about your mom. That’s hard enough for someone who doesn’t have OCD. I struggle with health anxiety and it’s incredibly hard. We want certainty all the time and it’s just not possible. Definitely tell yourself the truth though that the doctors have thoroughly examined you and you are healthy! Focus on that. Also, you’re 22 so you’re so young. Statistically, that should make you feel better. Hope you can do some specialized OCD therapy to help with it. Much love and you are NOT ALONE!!!

Jaclip

Date posted: 8w

I sooooo relate to what you’re going through. My mom was diagnosed with melanoma, but she didn’t die of that. She caught it early enough. I have had health OCD for years and I’ve changed themes over time…cancer, HIV, breast cancer, and on and on. For whatever reason now it’s skin cancer and I’ve done exactly what you’ve done…checked and checked and run to appt after appt. It’s exhausting and hard to get through because our brains are throwing up flares and warnings signs all over the place. We seek 100% certainty to move on which is an impossibility so we keep seeking it. I’ve been a part of NOCD for about a month and I’m seeing slight changes. I’m trying to be ok with uncertainty. It’s the only way to retrain our brains and let them know we’re ok and can handle things. I really hope you can take a brake from your thoughts and be present with your mom. I’m sorry she’s sick. Hang in there.

OCDMedStudent

Date posted: 16w

4th year Med student with Health OCD

You can laugh at the title if you want, it’s objectively pretty funny. Hi guys, this is my first time on this app and I mostly just wanted to see if anyone out there is in the same boat as me or works in health care and is dealing with this. I haven’t told anyone what’s going on. I’m in my 4th year of medical school and In the past year I’ve developed what I think is pretty bad health OCD. Now health anxiety is a really common thing for medical students to have, I know that. It wasn’t until recently that I realized that the constant lymph node checking, self diagnosing & examining and reassurance seeking could have definitely had crossed the line into compulsions. Both my parents are cancer survivors which is what originally made me want to become a doctor but now every single physical sensation I have sends me into hours or days of rumination that I or someone I love has stage 4 terminal cancer. I spent an entire vacation with my boyfriend having a silent panic attack and convincing myself that he was dying of pancreatic cancer when he just had food poisoning and was fine days later. I had a complete mental breakdown and told myself I had lymphoma for weeks when I realized I could feel some of my own perfectly normal lymph nodes in my neck. My logical brain knows this is completely ridiculous but the emotional brain will not shut the hell up. It seems cruel that I made it this far only to feel like my own damn brain is betraying my ability to think through health situations clearly. I’m determined to get my symptoms under control before I graduate in a year as I don’t want this to affect patient care. Just wanted to get this off my chest and see if anyone else out there in health care is struggling too.

br0wnie

Date posted: 7w

Health ocd

Hey everyone! I can’t stop worrying that I might be sick with something serious like cancer. I went to my doctor about a month ago and he checked me and said I’m okay. I didn’t do my blood test this year because I’m so scared of it (last year’s results were perfect). Lately, I spend most of my time constantly analyzing my body, trying to find if something is wrong, and I just can’t stop worrying. I also feel like checking online or even asking ChatGPT makes it worse. Has anyone else experienced this? If yes, how do you cope with it? Any advice would mean a lot. Thank you so much! 🩷

mickchicken

Date posted: 4w

tips for health ocd?

I’ve been diagnosed with OCD for like 10 years now and it was always pretty minor compulsions and thoughts. Around a year ago I had my first panic attack stemming from my left arm hurting and then thinking I would have a heart attack. Ever since that night I’ve had extreme ocd about symptoms and health issues. It feels like an endless cycle with my anxiety causing physical symptoms and then me obsessing over them. I can’t even get a headache anymore without thinking I’m gonna have an aneurism or something. I just want to re-gain control bc this is taking over my life and I remember what my life was like before this and miss it

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