Mitu_001

Date posted: 7d

How can I forgive myself?

It was a really serious situation.I didn't help a kid in danger years ago.Now I just keep thinking what happened and feel like a monster.And I am scared honestly.That I am like that person who hurt them.And I am scared I will be blamed.I am scared that I don't care and just don't want to be blamed.I just keep thinking what happened and how difficult it must been for them.They told me and I didn't help.I can't imagine.I am so mad .And I am afraid I dont care and even agree( it makes me sick when I think that).I wish I can do something..anything..but it might be too late.Apologise but I don't wanna make them remember.I feel responsible

Dee C

Date posted: 7d

Give yourself some compassion. I’m thinking the situation took place sometime ago. That being the case, we cannot rewind time. Sometimes the best we can do is learn from it and hope not to repeat it. I can tell you of the times that similar situations took place that in hindsight I thought I could’ve prevented. I can sit and remember those times while kicking myself but I choose to live in the present, forgive the past and move forward. I don’t mean this condescendingly, When you invent the Time Machine, drop a post here on your way to becoming a trillionaire! And again forgive the past and yourself for the sake of your own mental health.

nishant226158

Date posted: 6d

Is that kid alive now ? If he/she is alive, why you think so much ? He is saved now. That's sit.

Mitu_001

Date posted: 6d

Noo it wasn' t something about death. God.It was something else.They were harmed by someone and I didn' t help them I can't stop thinking I am responsabile and how to fix it

nishant226158

Date posted: 6d

I think that it's a common thing. You are asking about kid. I didn't help my friend. He felt very bad. I felt bad too while there are 11 or more people. How you expect a single person to beat many persons. So, don't take stress too much. Atleast, the kids you saw didn't die. Now imagine yourself in situation that if you were beaten by someone, would anybody help him. Very less chances are there. The thing is kids would stop thinking after some days too. So, you need to stop thinking about this.

Mitu_001

Date posted: 6d

Oh no..I am sorry you dealt with this.It was different situation but still serious.Maybe I need to be more kind but these thoughts scare and confuse me.Idk how to stop them

nishant226158

Date posted: 6d

“I understand why you’re feeling guilty—it shows how much you care. Please remember, you are not responsible for what happened. In difficult situations, it’s normal to freeze or feel powerless. The person who hurt the child is the one truly responsible. What matters now is that you’ve reflected on it, and if something like this happens again, you’ll know you can call for help or alert others. Please be gentle with yourself—you did not cause this. Talking about it, like you’re doing now, already shows your good heart.”

nishant226158

Date posted: 3d

Hi Are you feeling right now ?

Mitu_001

Date posted: 3d

@nishant226158 Hi.I am still feeling bad.I am trying to stop ruminating

nishant226158

Date posted: 2d

@Mitu_001 I will give you some advice tomorrow

nishant226158

Date posted: 2d

@Mitu_001 I am going to sleep now. Good night

Mitu_001

Date posted: 2d

@nishant226158 Alr ! Dont worry ! Thank you very much for responding.Good night

nishant226158

Date posted: Yesterday

@Mitu_001 Hi, Good morning I think that everybody make mistakes. Making mistakes and feeling guilt is normal. Guilt won't fix a person. Next time, please be responsible. Monster is that person who hurts people. You can put yourself in that situation that do you think that anyone would help you. It's very rare. You are a great person. Remembering a past can destroy your present as well as future. It happened year ago, I think that kid would forgot this incident too. So, you need to forget it too. Firstly, I think about these things too. But after that I started having ocd very much which is much worst than this. After that, I forgot. YOU NEED TO FORGOT. Can you become a friend ? If you don't mind.

Mitu_001

Date posted: 23h

@nishant226158 Thank you.Is still difficult..my mind still find ways to make me terrible.I don't know about the situation now. And what do you mean become a friend? To you?

nishant226158

Date posted: 20h

@Mitu_001 May be it would be fixed

nishant226158

Date posted: 20h

@Mitu_001 Yes, to become friend, maybe it's yours choice that you ask yes or no

Mitu_001

Date posted: 17h

@nishant226158 We can give each other advice

nishant226158

Date posted: 17h

Okay, the answer is no. But I have no problem 👍. Yeah, we can give advice to each other.

Mitu_001

Date posted: 17h

Sorry but I don't give my social media

nishant226158

Date posted: 9h

Okay, sorry

Mitu_001

Date posted: 56m

Don't worry!

Mitu_001

Date posted: 25w

I know I seek reassurance.But I really dont know what to do right now.I keep thinking about how I didnt help someone who was in a terrible situation a long time ago.They were a kid :( .Since then I keep thinking about what happened and how I didnt help.And I started to have intrusive thoughts ..about what happened..and other terrible themes.And I am really scared.I realised I keep thinking because I cant belive how difficult it was for them and how I could have helped and I didnt.I talked to a psychologist and they told me I didnt know how to deal with such a situation but I still blame myself.Sometimes I feel like they need help now, l but it was years ago.I stopped ruminating because it wont help anyone but I still have intrusive thoughts.I want to help now but I dont know if I can .I want to aplogise and make sure they are ok but I dont want to makw them remember.And I dont want to do that just because of guilt..I want to actually help.I feel like I did an unforgivable mistake..+ the terrible thoughts I have .Idk if I can ever share them with someone..ever..I feel like I am a dangerous person because I didnt help+ because of my intrusive thoughts.I really doubt myself..and feel like I shouldnt be trusted.Thank you if you have read all of this

Mitu_001

Date posted: 17w

Tw: trauma

Can someone talk with me? I know I posted a lot about this and I want to stop.I know only a therapist will tell me what to do..But please..can someone give me some advice? I am scared I did something horrible.I didnt help a kid 3 years ago.I feel like I left them in danger.I am so sorry.The worst is I didnt helped in all these years.I want to tell the kid I am sorry but I dont want to make them remember.I got terrible thoughts and I still have them and I feel like I betrayed them and still betray them.Bcs I didnt help and bcs of the thoughts.I dont know but I think about what happened.and how terrible it was..especially because they told me and I didnt help.I dont know why I think that but I feel like a monster.I met with them today and with their parents (which I feel like I betrayed them too) and I talked with them.but i was very anxious and I am scared their parents judge me .I want to help now..but idk how.Is it too late? I am scared I want to help just because I feel guilty.I want to live in the present and do something now but my mind makes me think of the past..Any advice? Thank you

Mitu_001

Date posted: 9w

I am terrified I am a monster

TW:trauma.. This can be very triggering... I was outside walking my dog.I met with the family of the kid who was hurt years ago(I mentioned abt this..it was really a bad and traumatizing event) .I warned them abt a dog (bcs they have a dog too ) who was walking around and bcs I think I saw it another day .And I talked with their mom and I thought: Am I lying ? Am I manipulating her into thinking I am a caring person when in reality I am not.Because I didnt helped the kid when they needed help.I was right there and didnt help and didnt told them.I feel like a traitor.Everytime we met and talk I am scared my friendly interactions mean I am lying to them and manipulate them.Bcs I didnt help their kid...:,( I am so so sorry for them.I feel like I left them in danger back then,that it was my fault..I cant stop thinking abt how they trusted me and I didnt help..and that event.Because no one should go through that..especially a kid.I am scared honestly..even now .And I am worried.I only care bcs their parents will be mad and blame me..I am scared I dont care abt what happened to the kid( I am sorry if this is triggering..I think these are also my intrusive thoughts) .Plus everytime I am near them I get intrusive images of what happened .And I feel like a criminal..plus other horrible thoughts that make me feel like I a monster.I have terrible thoughts over and over and I feel I am what I am scared of.That I acutually am.I started to belive this( still pray is just ocd)I know is weird( and I am sorry if this is triggering) but I feel like I am the person who hurt the kid.:,(.I just think I dissapointed them and hurt them (the kid..also the family).The worst is I dont even know if they told anyone.I will talk with a therapist abt this..but I want to know also your advices..if u can give me..I know this might be reassurance but I am desperate.These thoughts and intrusive images I get abt what happened are horrible.I cant imagine...:(.I only think abt how terrible it was for the kid..and I feel bad because I think abt it.I overthink my every action, I overthink everything abt my interactions with them and their family.This summer my family will go on a trip with them I think , and Idk if I should go.( tw: also think her dad thinks I am suspicious and I absolutely have no intent to hurt the kid.And that he think I am dangerous bcs I didnt help her:()This feels like hell and I feel like I am make myself a victim in a situation I made myself..I am sorry for putting so many tw.I know this sounds all so bad and suspicious..Either I am terrible or scared I am terrible or both...:(.Anyway I know I did a terrible mistake.Thank you so much if anyone reads all this and responds

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