Family member not understanding compulsions

Trigger warning ⚠️ , Hi, I’m Anna, I’m a young adult in my senior year of high-school. I’m not sure what subtype of ocd this may be but my obsession changes, usually one lasts 3 months- a year and it’s been like this since I was a small child. For example it used to be an obsession over sweat, then over religion, then over getting ill. Now it’s strange, very strange but I’m afraid of my dad slipping something into my food. We have a rocky relationship and in arguments he’ll sometimes makes comments that scare me like “we should all 0ff 0urselves” or that he wants us “dead”. I also smoke pot time to time and he doesn’t approve and I’ve had this strange fear of him slipping me something stronger to “teach me a lesson” after I eat anything of his if I absolutely have too I wait an 15-60 minutes and look for any signs of illness or a high. It’s exhausting because he mainly cooks in the house and I’ve lost 5lbs this week due to this fear..it’s consuming me and may be my most exhausting obsession yet.

I am married and neither,my husband or children understand what it feels like to have OCD. I have had it for some time now. Sometimes ig gets better while other times it acts up and feels just awful!! During these especially awful times I worry more, voice what I am worried about, and just feels depressed. I got even more depressed whwn my family members insult me because of my ocd. I know I should not voice my worries etc ask I am thinking that is a,compulsion but sometimes I do. I regret it afterward,cuz nothing food really happens as a result. More often I am judged, called names and then I really get depressed!!!! It sometimes tanes me days to feel better acter one of those wpisodes! I guess besides not viucing my worries what can I do in a family that does so ma y things that upset me....and it would wvwn if I did nit have ocd!!! I meant WE all have to live together and trust me....there are things they so that for sure woyld have bothered me way before I had o d! ,They would bother the father and son on the TV show Sanford and Son!!! How so I just,live in same house,all the,whike pretending those things,don't bother me? I meant I am the mom. Don't I get some say so without being called names etc?

Listen, I totally get it. It’s hard to hear a loved one obsessing over small, insignificant things. My mom tries to be supportive, but she gets so mad when I tell her what’s on my mind, and she just yells at me and says I’m crazy for thinking like this. So, I just sent her this, and I hope it helps: Mom, I know it’s really hard, but when I’m suffering with OCD thoughts, all I need is sympathy. Getting mad at someone for having OCD is like getting mad at someone for having a head injury. Please understand that I can’t help it, or else I would stop it. I need someone to say, “I’m so sorry that’s bothering you this much. It must be so overwhelming. It must be so hard to cope with this.” You could even ask me questions, like “What does it feel like? How much are you thinking about this? What helps you feel better?” I just need someone to validate my experience and sympathize, not tell me that I’m crazy or say my problems aren’t real. I’m aware these thoughts are crazy — that’s why I feel so alone and sad and scared. When you tell me my thoughts are crazy, it makes me feel even more like a freak. Sometimes, I just need someone to hold my hand and tell me I’m not alone.