I haven't been able to read about experiences similar to mine when it comes to my perfectionism OCD so I was wondering if anyone had any "uncommon" experiences.
Mine has shown up as needing to do tasks perfectly (absolutely no errors, ever) at work, needing to type the perfect email or message, find the perfect restaurant to visit. Generally, to have no room for doubt or error, or it would be the end of the world according to my OCD. This sometimes goes hand in hand with my just right OCD - finding the just right cup to use, or song to listen to, the right words when comforting someone. Do you want to share some of your experiences?
I relate to this. Whenever I look up perfectionism OCD it just shows up symmetry. For me, I have major imposter syndrome. I feel the need to be an expert or else I'm invalid. I'm a psychology major and I'm taking a hard neuroscience class. I feel like if I don't understand everything in the textbook, I will never be a good school counselor. I'm also a singer songwriter who has written over 40 songs but I still feel like I'm not a musician.
it comes up in many ways for me—one of them is that my sentences have to be exactly true to the best of my knowledge, if that makes sense? like if i know my bus arrives at 8:17 but i round to 8:20 i’m “lying.” which sounds like such a minor example but basically everything about my life has to line up straight and i can’t allow any ambiguity or i’m overwhelmed with guilt and fear and have to follow up with whoever i was talking to to clarify which is mostly just annoying for them🥴
@Anonymous not sure if this counts as perfectionism but i think it’s the closest category?
Oh i do this too, i never thought abt it as perfectionism, but you could be right
Im struggling with this myself, im a student and i failed for two year now, because whenever i have an exam if i dont prepare to it PERFECTLY i give up and i beat myself up , most of the times when its time to pass the exam i dont even read the questionsof the exam, my brain be like you didn't prepare perfectly of course you wont get a good grade, and the problem is i was doing this without knowing that there is something called perfectionism, i definitely do it in other things in my life , but it destroyed my studies
oh I totally relate to this! I would drop out of my classes because I thought I would fail even if I had good grades. If I missed one assignment, I would just drop the whole class. I dropped out of a total of 14 classes in the past 7 years. I've worked myself up to a fulltime load and I haven't dropped any classes in a full year :) there is hope, it gets better.
@avf2000 @avf2000 glad to hear it gets better for you, yeah it probably takes time and awareness and effort to get over it
I primarily have academic perfectionism with avoidance compulsions; if I get anxious that my schoolwork isn't "perfect" enough I'll flake and stop doing the work altogether. In my mind, if I don't try at all then I can't "fail", which is my biggest fear. Writing is my biggest trigger though. I've rewritten the same sentence over and over for half an hour before deleting it because the thought of it existing in its imperfect form is too distressing. It kind of feels like my imperfect writing is contaminating the universe with its very existence. A visceral disgust. I've worked through a lot of this - I rarely use a thesaurus when sending texts anymore lol - but I'm still nowhere near able to write an essay or write for fun like I used to.
@sophea I also get bothered if Scrabble pieces aren't centered on their squares and little things like that. But it's not nearly as big a deal for me.
This list by ai gives a good summary of my symptoms. Does it resemble OCD or is it something else? 1. Compulsions (OCD-specific behaviors): • Feeling the need to flex or contract muscles an even number of times, equally on both sides of your body. • Needing to reverse actions (for example, if you roll your eyes or trace a line with your finger, you feel compelled to do it again in the exact opposite way). 2. Intrusive Thoughts (OCD-specific ruminations): • Daydreaming about people you care about getting hurt (e.g., school shooting, injury, or kidnapping). • Sometimes feeling like you might want something bad to happen to someone you find attractive—possibly because of a desire to help or save them, though it’s confusing. • These thoughts can sometimes provide a twisted sense of relief while remaining distressing and confusing. 3. Sexual Orientation OCD: • Experiencing confusion or doubt about your sexual orientation. 4. Contamination Thoughts: • Feeling like things are contaminated, especially after touching something gross. 5. Sensory Compulsions: • Feeling the need to smell your hand after touching areas like your ear or hair. 6. ADHD-like Symptoms / Additional Observations: • Fidgeting or moving your legs when standing or sitting.
Has anyone experienced their reputation affected or misunderstood because of a societally taboo OCD theme? Others catching wind of your obsessions and misinterpreting it, assuming the worst? I’m intentionally keeping it vague because I don’t want my specific situation to get reassured, but it’s been a real tough pill to swallow knowing that people close to me (and anyone else they might talk to) think of me differently. I’m unwilling to share about my OCD because I feel pretty confident it will be taken as an excuse or denial, and feels compulsive and reassurance seeking. Let me know if anyone here has experienced anything like it, how they handled it, exposures you did.
OCD can be an incredibly lonely experience, especially when people around you don’t understand the thoughts and fears you’re facing. But you’re not alone—others have been there too. What’s something about OCD that makes you feel isolated or alone?
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