I'm 20 weeks pregnant, have suffered with ocd since 16. Had a mental break down over a year ago. Here I am feeling like I am relapsing and the thoughts are out of control, and even worse now that I feel guilty I am causing my baby stress when it's not his fault.
Hi anon. Children can be resilient including fetus. It has to be extreme and consistent stress for the baby to show signs of any affect, at most it let's the baby build some endurance the same way people eat very mild spicy food and notice there's a kick to it. They neither love or hate it, just "what a rush of change". This is not to dismiss your concerns, just to help you refocus that yes you are concern and you gave that right, yet the best resource is with your doctor and therapist as it's both a physical and mental combo to say yes see me, yet the things you can do is [insert task] like eating frozen yogurt as a self care and reset. It's hard to think alternatives when the hormones are dancing. I've had a dog that kept jumping into my stomach multiple times and my child was born just fine. It really hurt too and I stayed away from the dog (was not my dog) but it was much bigger and stronger and faster than me. Never did that prior to the pregnancy either and felt bad hating the dog over it because of the uncertainty and newness of motherhood. They really do say kids (and moms) are resilient. You got this.
Thank you for replying. I just feel so ashamed i was doing really well. I was having erp for a month or so and was on medication for almost a year. Unfortunately I came off the sertraline as my doctor couldn't confirm or deny if this would cause complications and given the fact I suffer with ocd and alot of it is to do with harming myself or others the worry of taking the meds whilst pregnant and causing my baby heart defects or breathing problems which they said could be possible I couldn't run the risk. I am clearly at some sort of stage where I am having a hormone change / surge whatever it's called because 2 months ago if I had intrusive thoughts I'd let them pass and remembered what erp taught me in a short space, but now it's like it's forgotten and all I keep thinking is I'm getting unwell again and it will spiral like it did before where I couldn't function.
@Anonymous That is rough. I was allowed to still be in sertraline at the time yet that was a decade ago so there could be new information and each doctor and medicine is different. Did the doctor provide alternatives such as certain exercises or food that can assist naturally in place of the setraline? I use a therapy lamp and walking with nature (no looking at devices so my eyes can dart left and right to help process emotions and thoughts better) nowadays especially if I missed my medicine dose. I can't take my medicine late or it keeps be up at night. Human minds do forget, otherwise we'd not repeat history with war. Memory is a muscle and even with self defense training can go out the window when it's time for action. So it's understandable the major changes may cause a disruption of memory and emotional misguidance during this time. On top of other changes in your life, going back to a therapist to tailor and make adjustments to your current situation may provide new insight and comfort that you deserve even if it's all the same information. No shame of having reminders. Just humanship.
Just wanted to jump on here and express how I have felt lately. The past 5 to 6 months have been pretty excruciating. I conquered OCD 5 years ago and for some reason, it has slipped back and took over my life again. More so the depression that came along with it. Is there anyone else out there that has returned to rock bottom where they once fully climbed themselves out of?
So I’ve just found out I’m pregnant and I’m freaking out rn I’ve been getting thoughts like “I’ll be a bad mum” and overthinking everything & my OCD is convincing me that I’ll act on my thoughts because of my hormones and stuff. I’ve also got a fear of being sick & I’m stressing over that too. Anyone else who has harm OCD pregnant or a Mum can give me some advice pls😭
Please if someone can reply! I really just need someone to talk to. I don’t even know how to control my OCD. It honestly feels like it’s controlling me. Everyday my mind focuses on every bodily sensation I have and it’s like a broken record player, I have horrible health anxiety and my OCD just makes it worst just thinking about it everyday. It feels like everyone who I explain it to looks at me like I’m stupid/crazy. I use to be much more tame with my OCD, I use to eat things without worry, now I can’t even touch things I use to eat without worrying that I’ll get an allergic reaction (despite eating them BEFORE,,,but my mind tells me otherwise) and omg worrying about heart attacks, pulmonary issues..and I couldn’t even enjoy my own child’s birth because my mind was on high alert thinking I would hemorrhage any second or develop pre-E (complications of postpartum) I was miserable for the first couple of months of my baby’s life and I didn’t know what to do. And now, I’m pregnant with my second (4wks) and all the OCD thoughts and anxiety is coming back at me and I have no one to talk to, I feel lonely. And even if I considered taking a pill, I’d worry about being allergic to it and refusing to take it. I ruin everything for everyone. I remember I ate out one night and I started to think “you’re gonna pass out! You’re gonna pass out! (Without ever passing out before) and I had to leave! I feel like I ruin the mood for everyone when I don’t even try to, and I hate it.
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