Can someone please offer words of advice :(

Why are things so real the first time they’re in my mind and then when I think about it later it’s easier for me to be like wtf?? I was watching a movie earlier and the young girl had developed more in the chest area than the last movie and I felt the desire to check her out so I did. Then later I let myself imagine her having sex and I liked it. But now looking back I’m like ew. The boys in the movie have also developed as the movie went on and I couldn’t help but think that in their real life they’ve probably woken up to boners and s*men and stuff. And looking back it’s just ugh. Idk if it’s sexual relevance but I genuinely let myself indulge in these thoughts and groinal responses and I remember thinking to myself I don’t want to be attracted to little kids and how do I stop myself (everyone has attractive qualities so in younger boys I see man like qualities). Idk I need help. I wouldn’t type this out if I truly believe I was messed up but I’m still scared

User type: Therapist

Date posted: 5d ago

It sounds incredibly distressing and confusing to experience thoughts that feel so real in one moment and then repulsive the next. Please know that experiencing intense, unwanted thoughts and the fear that comes with them is something many people face. If you’d like additional support, feel free to book a free call with our NOCD team. We’d be happy to share more information and explore ways to help. No one has to live in fear of their own thoughts. Also here are some helpful resources: https://www.treatmyocd.com/my-ocd-journey/healthy-control-of-my-life-and-happiness https://www.treatmyocd.com/my-ocd-journey/from-the-darkness-to-the-light https://www.treatmyocd.com/what-is-ocd/common-fears/can-watching-porn-be-a-compulsion-in-so-ocd

nae nae

Date posted: 6d ago

Treat these thoughts as intrusive, even if they feel real, even if you feel like you've built on them somehow. If you're distressed, it's OCD. Like you said, you wouldn't be posting here if it wasn't :)

FightOCDwithme

Date posted: 6d ago

That's the thing about OCD, it needs to feel real because otherwise it'd have no power over us, unfortunately, it also makes it hard to distinguish what feels real and what is actually real. Are you seeing a psychologist specialised in ocd for this? That is absolutely my number one tip because working with one will help more than you know. Another tip is to try and sit with the thoughts and feelings your experiencing and not react. Don't try to push them out of your head or ruminate on them or do something to alleviate your anxiety, just let them be. If that feels too difficult, you can try at first delaying a reaction to them, because this will help start to build up your ability to tolerate emotions like this. Another thing about OCD is it wants certainty, it literally craves it but no matter what it can never be certain enough, it'll always have another test or another what if question to keep you locked in the loop. So don't play it's game, if you find ocd asking a question, try responding to it with a "well maybe that's true but maybe it's not" thought and then refuse to engage with the thought further. Again this is easier said than done but with some practice it can help alot. Final tip, you can also try sarcastic agreement with the thought, or even adding further details to it to make it sound ridiculous. Again that's easier said than done at first but I've found it helps me. Hang in there, having experienced this theme and having successfully gotten my life back from it, I promise you it's beatable.

Anonymousssssss

Date posted: 5d ago

@FightOCDwithme I just can’t get over how I genuinely let myself indulge and enjoy it, I don’t want to be this way

anonymous2580

Date posted: 8w ago

Remembering things from my childhood

(20f) I have been dealing with severe OCD symptoms for as long as I can remember. I recently got diagnosed about a year ago, and even though I know that these thoughts are probably my ocd, I still cant shake them. Growing up I was always very sexually curious. I was sheltered from a lot of things, as I went to a private school and things like sexuality and sex were never talked about. I remember doing some weird sexual things growing up (never affecting another person), looking up taboo sexual things, etc. I always seemed to become aroused no matter what the situation was, even if I just saw someone getting changed. I have no recollection of being SA'd, so i'm wondering where this all came from? Was I just curious and wanted to experiment and try different things? Or am I really a pervert, pedophile, etc. I have all these thoughts racing through my head and it's killing me. Everything I did as a kid I look back on and am disgusted, as those don't align with my views at all today. I never thought growing up thinking these things were wrong, or actually realize what they were until I got older. I'd like to think it was just my curiosity, but i'm not sure. What if i'm in denial and actually do like these things? I just need to know if theres something wrong w me, I cant keep going on like this. Could really use some advice.

Here we go a...

Date posted: 20d ago

Someone please help me right now

I’m a csa survivor which made me develop hypersexuality while actually being a asexual individual. (Where I did CP and talked to groomers and sexted, ect ect) A few months ago I’ve started to heal, but the fact that I’ve seen so many private parts since I was idk, young? I imagine them everywhere, it’s really frustrating and sometimes I also get intrusive thoughts about other kids or my siblings. It’s deeply distributing but I also kind of think of it from a curious kind of aspect which I despise too. Honestly I have a hard time with any kid in underwear, my intrusive thoughts have been ALOT the last months and they’re really really overwhelming. I also easily go into overanalysing them or even trying to figure out more clearer the thoughts to “test myself”. I think, I hope. Idk it’s scary

POCD

Faker6532

Date posted: 19d ago

This felt way too real!!

Why the h•••ll did this happen to me? Seriously, I felt like a normal person yesterday, and now this morning, I feel like I am now a p•••do. When I first woke up, I kept thinking about about the usual things about a kid, only this time it felt real. It was like I was into them sexually and because of that, my private parts growed. Even though I kept saying "no, no ,no" a lot, I felt was only talking to open air and it didn't feel like I meant it God, for the last couple of days, I truly felt normal for once, and against these thoughts. But now I know that I am a p•••do and a piece of s••••it for seeing kids that way. If I could go back before all of this happened, I f••••cking would. Because I KNOW I was never like this before.

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Can someone please offer words of advice :(

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