I just recently kind of was getting over my Constant spiral of “am I a lesbian or bi?”(im a lesbian) and now I’ve been tackled by “am I trans” even tho I’ve never questioned my gender ever, I love being a woman, and I never thought I’d ever be dealing with this since I’ve always been so sure of being a woman, anybody else?
I suffer from TOCD, i'm in my longest flare up of this theme yet. I'm sure you will find your way around it as long as you accept uncertainty. However my advice is to understand that thinking is not wanting/desiring/longing for something. Your thoughts are not capable of manifesting into genuine wants, as OCD is egodystonic. Beware of over-analyzing, searching for "signs" or trying compulsions. I believe in you! You can do this! You are not alone :)
@Kands Thank you💔 tho it’s all easier said then done
@Kands I try so hard to accept the uncertainty But it feels violating
I also have TOCD, hang in there
@sofiaraaah7 Thank you, though I’m going through one of the worst times of my life right now
@ermhiiii Same 🥲
Ocd is funny because there's never solid evidence and it's not based on reality but fears
@Ms.shelovesfrogs No yeah definitely!
@Ms.shelovesfrogs It’s crazy
@Ms.shelovesfrogs Like I’ve never once in my life questioned my gender like at all, suddenly I saw a TikTok yesterday about a guy who thought he was a lesbian but then turned out to be trans and then suddenly I got triggered
@Ms.shelovesfrogs Even tho that doesn’t correlate with me at all because I love being a woman and love all things feminine
@Ms.shelovesfrogs I’ve been trying to get rid of the thoughts but it’s like they keep coming back each time more horrible
@ermhiiii Ocd sucks 😞
@ermhiiii Tiktok triggered my soocd theme...that "hi, I'm Gibby" sound that my brain said that sounds like I'm gay and that was the beginning of shii that sent me to the psychiatric hospital
@ermhiiii Yup ocd goes when you stop trying to get rid of them
@Ms.shelovesfrogs I try to not fight it so bad but it feels so violating
@Ms.shelovesfrogs It’s the stupid things like that, they seem so small yet they can trigger a whole web of intrusive thoughts and then a whole spiral
@ermhiiii I hate Ocd and wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy
@Ms.shelovesfrogs I hate it when people act like ocd is jsut silly things like oh i need to organize my pencils in this order and this and that, but ocd is a very emotionally draining illness.
@Ms.shelovesfrogs It feels like you’re losing yourself, and it sucks.
@Ms.shelovesfrogs That worries me because I feel like I have some evidence
@sofiaraaah7 It's most definitely ocd twisting things to be evidence...is your soocd getting better?
@Ms.shelovesfrogs Oh, I don’t have so-ocd. I have t-ocd (OCD around transgender themes)
@sofiaraaah7 Ohh that's alright, I hope it gets better
Thank you for sharing this, it takes courage to talk about such confusing experiences. It's not uncommon for OCD themes to shift, sometimes moving from one area of doubt like sexual orientation to another like gender identity, even when you've previously felt very certain. If you’re struggling and need more assistance, remember that help is available. Please don’t hesitate to reach out to us at NOCD to find out how we can support you. Also here are some helpful resources: https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/bisexuality-so-ocd-the-invisible-so-ocd/ https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/transgender-ocd-symptoms-and-treatment/ https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/soocd-thoughts-and-symptoms/
I have soocd and I've had tocd before
@Ms.shelovesfrogs It sucks omg, I love being a woman and I do not want to be a man whatsoever and I’ve never questioned that yet suddenly jsut when I was getting over the whole spiraling over being a lesbian thing now this
@Ms.shelovesfrogs May I ask how you kind of got over this?
@ermhiiii It just did go😭... it's a theme that usually comes, stays for like a week then go and come back. Rn I'm struggling with SO-OCD(I'm straight but still having am I lesbian thought even tho there's no evidence)😩💔 it's getting so much better with drugs I started recently(it is going)
@Ms.shelovesfrogs I’m glad to hear you’re getting over it! Sexuality ocd is an assholeeee and I’m sorry if my comment triggered you!
@Ms.shelovesfrogs I’m kind of getting a little more clarity on my TOCD(thankfully)
@Ms.shelovesfrogs But it’s like my brain is”but what if I’m trans?” Even tho there’s absolutely no evidence to back that up
@ermhiiii It is honestly...my brain and body just won't long for females (I just finished crying because the guy I like doesn't like me😓)..but ocd won't hear it...can I ask sumn? With your ocd, how did you realise it wasn't just soocd but you were actually into females(sorry if this is triggering) like did you low-key desire them? Or...it has been since childhood there were signs
@ermhiiii HONESTLY...it literally be interupting my thought process with the intrusive thoughts
@Ms.shelovesfrogs Oh yeah no there were definitely signs during childhood, plus I was always very sure that I liked girls in a way that wasn’t platonic, I loved them in a romantic way and I definitely did Fantasize about women, meanwhile I never did about men, men were never in my thoughts I rarely thought about them
@Ms.shelovesfrogs Men were kind of like secondary characters to me tbh
@Ms.shelovesfrogs Meanwhile my ocd didn’t come for “oh maybe we’re like Straight” because that was never In the picture because that was DEFINITELY not true, it always tackled the “am I bi or lesbian” Becuase I was always sure I liked girls , meanwhile I never really liked guys or longed for the attention from guys
@Ms.shelovesfrogs I actually always got super mad when guys liked me, I never liked their attention but I did like the ego boost
Oh okay "I always got super mad when guys liked me"😭😭😂😂😂 valid because I'm into men and I have to touch some grass like everyday 😂😂😂😂(girl can you believe that my bf doesn't like me again, he said he's scared because he has never been cared for and loved like this... I'm lost r because I love him so much and wanted him to be the one I marry💔😓) Anyway that's alright
Im a 21 year old female in a straight relationship with the best guy a girl could ever ask for. About 2 months ago, I went to get coffee with a friend and as I dropped her off, I got a “weird” vibe from her and the look she gave me which lead to the thought of “should I kiss her”….Ive never had a thought like that before and I never have ever wanted to kiss another girl. I have also never had a desire to be with another girl (sexually or romantically). Now though, I have had one other experience of being with a different friend going to get lunch and it felt weird. Ever since then I have been on google non stop with hundreds of different searches, questioning if im lying to myself of my boyfriend, wondering about my past relationships even though Ive only dated boys, been attracted to boys, crushed on boys, etc… boy crazy! Reading on other forums has been a big thing too or doing quizzes. I believe its SO-OCD but im so scared that what if its not. I am in therapy and actually had two weeks of not even thinking about it or googling it until yesterday. I dont know what to do.
Sorry long post. Anyone feel like now they’re just in extreme denial. Like when I was little I noticed guys more than girls in movies and was more drawn to them. I remember changing my mindset to switch that. 98%of my life has been straight until recently. I felt drawn to some guys but never thought of it sexually. Always had girl crushes dreams and porn. Now I watch porn and I feel like straight takes longer and then I go and watch gay porn and feel nothing until I tell myself it’s two attractive dudes and love is love and imagine physical sensations and then it hits like suddenly. Like I have to convince myself it’s alright. Then when I try again I can do all that but feel nothing and then straight porn works. Idk if it’s just getting a fix or the first time works with anything or what but it’s confusing. On top of that I’ve felt girl relationships including my wife maybe miss something and a guy maybe matches that feeling that but then I feel like I’d be missing something without a girl or my wife. Idk I’ve had some rough times in life with male figures in my life but idk. I feel like I have to convince myself more and more that I’m straight even more than the first time I dealt with this. Can someone relate? Please
I started having intrusive thoughts about my sexuality when I got into a relationship with my ex and I wondered if it would seemingly go away but it hasn’t and I find myself ruminating about it constantly especially before or during my period. Has anyone else felt with this?
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