Anyone else has this happen?

Anyone else just have days where they feel more calm and don’t have as many intrusive thoughts? But then later at night time it just comes back so you only had relief even for a little bit 😞😞 I feel like even when I’m not having my OCD send me intrusive thoughts, I always have a feeling in my stomach that something is wrong/off or a sense of doom. I always just feel on edge and anxious as if my mind is always preparing itself for the next horrifying intrusive thought to torment me with ugh 🫠

j vv

Date posted: 17d ago

I almost always have symptom spikes at night. For me, there is a lot of uncertainty about how today went, and what will (or won’t) happen tomorrow or in the coming week. I’ve noticed intrusive thoughts pretty much happen around the same time like clockwork! So when I am aware, I simply think something like “Ah, OCD, right on time” and then do my best not to engage with the thoughts. It is getting better for me with therapy and ERP! Would highly recommend it if you aren’t seeing a therapist already. Best of luck, fellow late-night worriers 💜

Aldxma.steph

Date posted: 17d ago

@j vv Thank you so much for your response! 🥺 I’m doing my best to not pay attention to the intrusive thoughts and use non engagement responses but the content of the intrusive thoughts is really disturbing so each day I just end up either crying or just feeling really awful and guilty/anxious. I’m trying to be more compassionate with myself and remind myself that I didn’t just wake up one day and choose to start having such awful intrusive thoughts just out of nowhere and that they’re not who I am or representative of my character 😞

Anonymous

Date posted: 17d ago

This happens to me too. You are not alone. I feel like my “recovery” / journey with OCD & response prevention messages is a roller coaster. One day I might feel “back to normal” and the next is a real downer & I feel back in OCD’s grips. Also I recently learned the anxious feeling when you have nothing to be anxious about is called back door spike and it’s basically OCD trying to bring you back in. I told my therapist about it and we made an RPM related to that- so would recommend to do that to have in your back pocket.

Aldxma.steph

Date posted: 17d ago

@Anonymous I feel like some days I have an easier time and don’t experience as many intrusive thoughts and feel somewhat more calm, and some days I feel like the intrusive thoughts get so bad and I feel so awful and just so much guilt, shame, anxiety, sadness, etc. I think I’ve experienced the back door spike for sure because there has been a few times that I don’t feel as anxious and then I start to worry that I’m not feeling anxious or not having as many intrusive thoughts and then it makes me think “am I faking having ocd” or “do I even have ocd”? 😭😭

j vv

Date posted: 17d ago

@Aldxma.steph Ah, the old “make ‘em doubt if they have OCD” ploy. It is OCD’s hail-mary attempt when nothing else is working! If you start having those doubts, just know you are doing a great job. OCD wants you to think the opposite—to be *certain* it is YOU who is flawed…because that is all it is trying to get you to do: find certainty in the worst places. I find this doubt creeps in when I’m managing my symptoms pretty well and not responding to a high spike of intrusive thoughts.

j vv

Date posted: 17d ago

@Anonymous This was super helpful! I hadn’t heard this term yet. I found NOCD’s article on backdoor spikes for anyone interested: https://www.treatmyocd.com/what-is-ocd/info/ocd-stats-and-science/backdoor-spikes-how-to-deal-with-sudden-ocd-episodes

sophmad99

Date posted: 17d ago

Yeah I do feel this. I feel like if that happens to me at night after a pretty good day then it just negates everything from earlier and it shouldn’t because getting through hours without as many intrusive thoughts or managing them well is still good. I hope that you can do this better than I can and give yourself the compassion we all deserve. I’m working on it too

Aldxma.steph

Date posted: 17d ago

@sophmad99 I get spikes in intrusive thoughts in the morning when waking up and also when wanting to go to sleep 😞 It makes it so hard to be able to fall asleep even when my eyes feel so heavy, but it’s the constant intrusive thoughts that keep my mind awake. OCD onset happened to me almost two months ago now and I’m really just trying to navigate all of this and take things day by day because I’ve been feeling so lost and confused and scared why these intrusive thoughts just started happening to me out of nowhere when they’ve never happened to me before. I have yet to be diagnosed and am seeing a psychiatrist in a few days so I’m hoping to be able to just tell them what my symptoms are and get confirmation that what I have is OCD.

issphra 🫶🏻

Date posted: 21w ago

Does anyone else..

Feel guilty for not giving into compulsions like rumination and confessing? I feel guilt for having an intrusive thought, trying to shrug it off or just giving it a few seconds of thought and moving along. This sounds like improvement but I still struggle with the anxiety and the guilt. The shame. I’ll be okay and then I’ll remember I have OCD and my stomach will drop and I just want to curl up and cry.

Anonymous 25#

Date posted: 18w ago

Weird ?

Has anyone ever just felt weird? It’s hard to explain but I just feel weird lately. I usually suffer with harm OCD and I feel like lately I’m not reacting to things I normally would. There’s certain things that will trigger me a little but then other times (like over the last few days) it’s like I feel nothing. I’ll get thoughts and because I don’t feel the physical sensation in my chest or get very emotional like I normally would it’s weird to me. Does this mean I’m liking the thoughts now? Or like I’m comfortable with those actions happening? I’m so confused. Has anyone ever gone through this?

bluefire2235

Date posted: 9w ago

Stuck in-between

I don’t know how to deal with the thoughts that come and barely gone. Usually, the brain often remembers and forgets things. People with OCD however struggle with trying to forget the intrusive thoughts because of the imbalance trying to convey what is real and if the thoughts in your head will come true. Just for the past few days, I was having fun and suddenly hit with a wave of obsessive thoughts and making me stuck with nowhere to go.

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond

Anyone else has this happen?

Related posts

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Be a part of the largest OCD Community