- Date posted
- 6w ago
backpedaling
just when I think i’m having a good weekend and I can forget about my struggles my brain tells me i’m not allowed to feel happy and that there’s always SOMETHING i need to be worrying about. so frustrating :(
just when I think i’m having a good weekend and I can forget about my struggles my brain tells me i’m not allowed to feel happy and that there’s always SOMETHING i need to be worrying about. so frustrating :(
Hi, I’m sorry OCD is running your weekend. That’s what it does, it’s like a broken alarm clock, constantly going off and telling you something is wrong even when nothing actually is. One thing I like to keep in mind is that I decide what’s worth my attention. I can acknowledge the thought, recognize that the alarm is blaring, but still go on with my day. The noise doesn’t have to control what I do. I used to feel anxious about not being anxious, always checking in on my emotions like I was waiting for something bad to happen. But emotions; whether it’s happiness, anxiety, or anything else—are like clouds. They come and go, we acknowledge them, but we don’t have to chase them or hold onto them. You don’t have to earn happiness, and OCD doesn’t get to decide whether you deserve to feel good. I hope your day gets better!
@AnonymityK this is a great tool, thank you :))
Hi there, OCD loves to join the party when it isn't invited or wanted. I can imagine you were having a lovely weekend, relaxing and maybe even noticing an absence of fear when boom, OCD pops up and starts demanding worry about future potential concerns. I love the clouds in the sky recommendation given by another Member! Here is a video with other tips to challenge the compulsive rumination, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UXIllLvRUZE
@Jennifer Dalimonte thank you so much i really appreciate it!!
@violettag6 - You are most welcome!
Hi ! just wanted to send well wishes your way. OCD can be so debilitating.
I feel the same way so often 😢 I hope your brain settles down and lets you enjoy your time, and I’m glad you had those happy feelings in the first place! ✌️
@flyana thank you!!!
Ugh, I feel that. OCD is so relentless sometimes. I'm glad you had a pretty good weekend even with your brain still causing some hardship! I know that's frustrating.
Hello, I am so sorry that you had this experience. It sounds frustrating and disheartening. At the same time, I think it would be worthwhile to consider the following. First, you did have a period of time that was enjoyable and maybe even blissful. That is a sign of improvement in your struggle with OCD and/or anxiety as I bet that there was a time when your OCD and/or anxiety prevented you from having any substantial amount of time without feeling stressed. Secondly, while it is true that you cannot control these thoughts, you CAN control your actions. Meaning, you can acknowledge how annoying and disruptive these thoughts are, but then go on with your day and do the activities you want such as exercise, reading, going out with friends, etc. Actually being active can be much healthier than sitting around your home moping over your unwanted thoughts.
@Noah Pollack I’ve definitely been trying to get myself more motivated and trying to stay active since i posted this. I really appreciate the advice :)
@violettag6 You are very welcome and I wish you much success with this!
My last and almost life long theme/sub-theme largely subsided recently and my ocd felt like it wasn’t even an issue. Then I went on winter break from uni and being alone made my mind come up with a whole new topic to obsess over. TLDR on my fears, my advisor wouldn’t email me back for a while about signing up for classes so my mind started to worry “what if he doesn’t in time and you can’t enroll this semester and you lose this whole life you just built and all these new friends” So when that issue was resolved my mind found other scarier ways I could be uprooted from my current life and friends that I’ve grown so attached to. Then my mind remembered back when I was struggling with false memories and scrupulosity and I essentially made a post on a forum 2 and a half years ago saying I did something or was convinced I did something that I never actually did. Now I’ve been spiraling about someone finding it reporting me and I either get seen as a horrible person or arrested or something over something I never actually did but “admitted” to out of fear of going to hell. My mind won’t let it go and keeps finding new reasons for it to be “valid” “logical” or even inevitable. I feel like it’s just hanging over my head and I can never rest easy. Especially when I try to focus on my daily tasks or plan for the future I get this horrible flair up of “why plan for the future when this could come back in that future and you get uprooted from all of it” my mind won’t rest without certainty being uprooted won’t happen but certainty doesn’t exist, at least not with ocd. This sucks and I miss being care free.
My mind just starts racing with thoughts all day. I overthink aswell so I just tend to sit in the thoughts and can’t escape. I mostly have thoughts that tell me I don’t like the things I do like snowboarding or backpacking or if I even if I love my girlfriend. Deep down I know I do but then I start getting worried that the more I think these things the more they come true. Then I have tons and tons of more thoughts throughout the day and it just feels like I’m constantly having anxiety and constantly battling my brain over things that don’t even make sense. I’m only 17 and this is extremely hard and I feel like I’m wasting these teenage years. I don’t know what to do or where to go. I’ve picked up reading my bible and praying more but the thoughts persist please help.
Does anyone else ever feel like this? When you're having a good day without a lot of fear after having multiple days of fear, you start worrying that your good day will be ruined by fear again. It's like anticipatory fear. Anyone else get this? I hate it but I don't know how to make it stop
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