I’m worried I don’t actually have OCD

Don't want to give you reassurance but, meta ocd is a common theme

Rule #1 of OCD- it will ALWAYS try to convince you its not OCD. Its almost a hack you can use to KNOW its OCD. When I was early In my recovery I would say that phrase in therapy EVERY WEEK " what if I don't even have OCD and this is all actually real" and my therapist would point out " what if=OCD" and once I was more along the road with recovery I realized why its called " the doubting disease". Dont take the bait, just let that idea pass, its brain junk mail, no need to open it.

It also honestly doesn't matter. OCD isn't a disease and it's not a black and white diagnosis. Intrusive thoughts, anxiety, and compulsive behavior are experienced by pretty much everyone to some degree. OCD is just a label used when someone experiences those things often and intensely enough that it's debilitating to them. Even if you don't fall into the OCD diagnosis, the tools used to treat it are useful. It's kind of like GAD (generalized anxiety disorder), which is basically just a label for people who experience anxiety often enough to "qualify" them for the disorder. For whatever reason, their nervous system is just more easily triggered than others. If you often feel really anxious, it would be kind of silly to worry whether or not you're "faking" having GAD.