- Date posted
- 45w ago
STD contamination fears
Does anyone else have really bad contamination OCD surrounding stds? Because I can hardly find anything about it on here.
Does anyone else have really bad contamination OCD surrounding stds? Because I can hardly find anything about it on here.
I get very worried about this and my partner will get upset sometimes cause we've been together for 7 yrs and doesn't understand why I would be scared if I'm not cheating. I can get a test and it say negative and I'll just assume the virus or whatever just isn't detectible yet and I'll probably be positive in a few months. I've done this a lot with HIV and hepatitis. I'm still not sure I don't have them but I literally just got tested a week ago š„“ also I work in a dental office and see blood all the time so that def doesn't help.
@_sarah_ I relate to this so much! My partner and I have been together for 6 years and I still struggle with std fears and chronic testing.
That is my biggest fear, I canāt tell you how many hiv tests Iāve done within a year for the most surreal reasons I never seem to accept that I donāt have it and stop panicking
Oh yeah- that was a big one for me. Paranoid about every ingrown hair. Terrified of sleeping with anybody who had slept with anybody else. It significantly impacted my relationships and how I chose a partner. Itās a tough one to cope with.
This is a big part of my contamination OCD. Itās been hard dating. I took some time off from dating when my OCD was at its peak. I havenāt slept with a new person in 6 years, itās tough to explain to my friends why I havenāt been dating. Iāve been slowly getting back on the apps though after doing exposure therapy
Dose anyone else experience that your OCD calms down and goes to the back of your mind during- feels almost safe and unaware of it but as soon as it's over and youve calmed down all the intrusive thoughts come rushing back 10x worse? I've had really awful panic attacks because of it the past two nights and it's exhausting I haven't been with another person in over a year because of how bad it was after and not being able to explain it properly to partners "no I'm not crying because of you" "no you didn't do anything wrong" I feel insane- like I'll never be able to have a normal functioning sexual time alone or with others do to it the compulsions that come with it are exhausting it's like the need to cleanse myself of filth like I'm disgusting and horrible until there's no traces I did anything in the first place I'm just so tired dose anyone have any tips of how to work through this- or at least be able to enjoy myself without crying afterwords? I have no idea what subtype this would even entail? I'm going to go with contamination I guess ?
I don't know what to do, my hands have become so numb and bruised because of constant washing hands, i have started hating each and every furniture around me, beacuse i feel they are not clean although they are being cleaned regularly but i cannot stop these thoughts. I clean my phone, bluetooth, charger with wet wipes each day, i don't touch any object around me, i am not being able to focus on my studies or anything else because of my ocd ihave stopped going out, everyone around me is so fed up of me. I have consulted so many therapists and been taking ayurvedic supplements too but nothing works. It is getting worse and worse, please if anybody can suggest me how to overcome these thoughts!
Trying not to seek reassurance, but rather connect the dots on my OCD and possible reasons as to why I am the way I am. I have severe OCD (or at least I hope I do) mainly surrounding POCD. I've had symptoms of OCD the majority of my life but this theme has come up more recently. When I was a kid, and i'm talking 6-7, I was first exposed to some really gross adult content online. It was introduced to me by a friend of mine around the same age of me. I saw some really disgusting things that a 6-7 year old should definitely not see. This was not a one time occurrence, as I had been exposed to taboo topics online years to come after that, such as the same friend introducing me to Omegle... And i'm sure you can imagine how that went, theres a lot of genuinely disgusting human beings on there. Coming back to the reason for making this post; is it possible to early exposure to this content could be one of the reasons I struggle with POCD? It genuinely scares me to death because you hear that real p*dos dealt with simular situations when they were kids, so thats kind of making me feel that this could be more than OCD, and I could be a genuinely bad person. My POCD feels so real, that at times i'm fully convinced its not OCD. Sometimes I can't even distinguish the feelings of attraction between a younger person and an older person, except for the feeling of anxiety and fear. Its really hard to explain without going into detail, but it just feels so real. Some feedback on this would be great, thank you all.
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