I gave into a POCD intrusive thought. Nothing came of it, but it was wrong. I feel really guilty and am terrified to tell my therapist but I feel like I should because of the guilt. I hate this so much.
This happened to me recently. I think it's important to be so open and honest in therapy. This way you and your therapist can assess everything, how it happened, why it happened, if there were any changes, etc. Don't feel bad, people relapse all the time and it's common. You just have to get back on the horse and start again. And don't feel like you wasted everything and are starting from the beginning. Don't give that to your OCD. And finally if you ever feel like you are being 'judged' by your therapist that is probably just the OCD too! Especially if you know your therapist is someone that you can trust.
But what if it was something deemed illegal? Nothing came of it like I Said but POCD I feel like is especially difficult
@Anonymous - Thinking about doing something illegal and doing something illegal are two separate things. OCD is clinging onto it because it's "illegal". My OCD clings onto my relationship and doubts every single aspect of the person that I am with, because he's so important to me. If it wasn't illegal or wasn't "bad", it wouldn't bother the OCD
Okay, you gave in to an intrusive thought, so you had a setback, don't you think that it's ocd telling you to feel guilty? Your therapist needs to know when you're able to resist and when you are successful, Rome wasn't built in a dat, you can't expect to be perfect and never have a setback.
I know. It's just hard accepting that I can do things going against my morals sometimes.
I mean stigmatized
I know how you feel, currently feeling the same way :( I tend to confess to my therapist but she usually always says it’s OCD
I did a few sexual compulsions (only with myself of course) in the past (2 months ago , did it couple of times) and I regret it BADLY I want to die every time because of that because of the guilt that I can’t handle it I feel like a monster I can’t move on from this. I feel like I deserve nothing in life. I prefer to kill myself then do it again. Like what went on my mind. I wanted to check and get rid of the thought but I can’t live with the shame. I posted this a few times but cant move on. What I did was BAD sexual compulsion. My therapist said to me that people with ocd can have a sever compulsions. And I think I told her about this compulsion but I think she forgot so I’m planning to said it to her again so she will tell me if it’s actually ocd or not. And the fact that I did have another themes before Pocd but I don’t know if I have Pocd anymore cause I feel like a monster and like I crossed the line. I’m terrified that I went to far. I regret I badly. There is not a single day I’m not thinking about it and want to kill my self. That compulsion is against my morals like I become the person I was afraid of all the time. The shame will it me until the day that I die
Feel guilty for not giving into compulsions like rumination and confessing? I feel guilt for having an intrusive thought, trying to shrug it off or just giving it a few seconds of thought and moving along. This sounds like improvement but I still struggle with the anxiety and the guilt. The shame. I’ll be okay and then I’ll remember I have OCD and my stomach will drop and I just want to curl up and cry.
I’m really struggling with something related to me ocd, and I would appreciate kind and supportive advice. If you can’t relate or don’t think anything you have to say would be helpful, I kindly ask pls refrain from commenting this is a really sensitive topic for me. Recently, I’ve noticed a pattern that feels something extremely new and distressing. The first time it happened I remember telling myself before self pleasuring that I am in control no matter what thought comes into my mind because I wanted to prove to myself that these thoughts are just from OCD and I know who I am and an intrusive that came out of no where, and i suddenly felt an intense fear that I was acting on it. In the moment I genuinely felt like I did. And afterword, I panicked and started questioning myself. This SAME FEELING has happened three times in a row each time, the intrusive thought was unwanted and random, and completely against my morals most recently it involved pocd and it feels even worse because it generally felt like I acted on it the thought in the moment while I was self pleasuring the panic doesn’t hit until afterwards when I stop :/ I start thinking that maybe I generally made a mistake and I’m now just realizing that it’s wrong because it generally feels like that :( but when I actually think about it again goes against my morals and values doesn’t make sense it feels incredibly real, and I can’t seem to shake this feeling off that I may have acted on it I’m terrified because I never wanted these thoughts in the first place. And I definitely didn’t choose them. If I had known, I would’ve had these intrusive thoughts I wouldn’t have self pleasured in the first place but it’s extremely hard to convince myself that this may be OCD because I feel like I have no other reason to believe that I didn’t act on it :/
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