anyone else get nervous to “look too deeply” into themselves bc of the intrusive thoughts and lies that arise from ocd? when i analyze myself too deeply ocd will tell me that i’m something i’m not
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If you're talking about trying to analyze your mind, that's definitely not going to be helpful because OCD hijacks our cognitive process and there's nothing we need to "figure out" about our OCD thoughts. But if you're talking about meditating or putting awareness inwards, then you're meeting anxiety where it's at. If intrusive thoughts arise, know that it's your mind trying to protect you, it's a false alarm. Your true nature is the silent awareness that watches your thoughts -- you are not your thoughts or your mind. I wish you the best <3
@perasperaadastra thanks! it’s more of me trying to analyze a physical feeling, which i suppose it the same thing. because i analyze my feelings and anxiety (along with intrusive thoughts) arise
@snowflakes Yup, I’d say that analysing (thoughts, emotions, reactions, physical sensations etc) is a compulsion. It’s not dangerous in the sense that you’ll discover something awful in yourself (that’s just ocd nonsense) but it’s “dangerous” in that it will only feed your ocd. Thinking itself isn’t dangerous. So allow yourself to think, to notice things, let your thoughts and emotions be there. It’s safe to experience them all. BUT it’s important not to automatically accept every thought and emotion as truth. (That’s where ocd is trying to go) We have thousands of thoughts a day and most are nonsense, or just background noise we don’t even remember 5 min later. And a lot of it is random. They say nothing about who you are. Because everyone has thoughts and feelings they don’t like or that make them uncomfortable at times. Literally everyone. Your reaction to the thoughts and feelings you don’t want (analysing them, from the assumption there’s something bad about you) is what’s causing your anxiety. So I’d say to try and find a way to expose yourself to your own thoughts and let them be there. Don’t analyse them but also don’t push them away. Let them be there without you doing anything with them.
Yeah I experience this but also in an outward sense too, I don’t want to analyze anything too deeply because I get myself scared. If I find out something uncomfortable my OCD kinda makes me think that the existence of a bad thing taints all life and all existence is bad… I know it’s not true but it gets me freaked out. It’s a weird symptom that only started happening recently. I used to be very happy with my curiosity, but now I’m a little afraid of it because when I reach a point of confusion I spiral
I’ve been feeling the urge to avoid intimacy or purposefully engage (for reassurance that I won’t give into a compulsion) because of intrusive thoughts and fear that I’ll “check/test” my reactions. My OCD is making me so scared that I’ll purposefully think of a child and try to see if I like it. It’s so complicated but I guess I’m mentally checking if I would mentally check during intimacy. I’ve even envisioned myself checking and it’s making me so nauseous. I know it’s a compulsion like any other but the sound of “touching yourself to the thought of a child” sounds atrocious and vile. I’m terrified I’ll automatically start checking next time I am being intimate. I truly feel so worried. If anyone has gone through something similar, I’d appreciate hearing your experience. Or if anyone has any advice?
harm ocd is the bane of my existence. people always tell me that if you have anxiety over a thought, that’s ocd. and these intrusive thoughts cause me IMMENSE anxiety. i’m constantly looking for reasons why i’m not what these thoughts tell me i am. but WHY DOES IT FEEL SO REAL?? it’s like i can’t reassure myself that this isn’t me and i don’t want to do it, but i also look for reasons why it’s not me. my brain is constantly telling me “if you don’t act on this, you’ll never feel free”. WHAT EVEN IS THAT?? and why does it feel real?? anytime i think about getting therapy, i constantly think that it’s not going to help me positively but help me realize i am this person. i just wish someone with harm ocd could get into my brain, understand me, and tell me everything will be okay. i wish someone in recovery could tell me that they’ve been where i am, felt the same feelings, thought the same thoughts, and got through it when they thought they wouldn’t. i feel like i’m drowning in it. another thing is i think about how my mom knows a surface level understanding to this form of my ocd, but if she knew it all, i’m scared she’d never look at me the same. i’m scared she’d be scared of me and think i need psychiatric help. IM TERRIFIED.
i have been diagnosed with OCD & generalized anxiety disorder. for some reason, i’ve been very hyper aware of everything. like the way i talk, the way i see the world, how certain things sound/look/feel, and it’s very distressing. i feel like the hyper awareness makes me afraid of things? like for some reason, my mind attached to cartoons, and i was hyperfocusing on it, and got extremely scared, like scared of the cartoon for no reason? i’ve done this a lot, and i get scared i have psychosis or schizophrenia, or something that makes you afraid of things for no unknown reason. i feel so scared that this is my new normal…. im heartbroken. so many what if’s. did i just ruin my own life?? 💔
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