Do not read if you are religious. A rant.

I am a Christian, and I can completely relate to most of what you are saying. Much - and sadly maybe even most of - the church is ill equipped to handle OCD as a mental illness. I have struggled with this most of my life, almost as early as I can remember….and the advice I have received has completely been unsatisfactory - even from my own family members! A few comments - Christians respond incorrectly because of a lack of knowledge, not necessarily b/c they feel they have a “superior” faith. Whenever a medical condition is misunderstood as spiritual, the advice becomes destructive….and you said it well, it becomes for OCD. I recently published a book about my life with OCD, and how to fight it as a Christian. Please contact me at the www.WagingWarAgainstOCD.com and I will send you a free copy if you provide an address. If you don’t want to send your address to a complete stranger (completely understandable!) there is a link on the site where you can purchase it. I will share a few snippets below in a few minutes (have to switch computers).

Imagine a world- class kickboxer, one of the best, with one major problem: he is incredibly closed off from the world and overly protected by his trainer. The trainer is also world-class and has one major problem: he is closed-minded about injuries. He believes a physical injury exists only if there is blood to show for it. Therefore, anytime the boxer has a busted nose, it is taken care of immediately. However, one day the boxer suffers a severely bruised rib during a bout. After the fight he describes the pain to his trainer, pleading for an X-ray. However, because no blood is visible, the trainer shrugs off the injury as whining and having a poor attitude. In this scenario, two things would occur. First, the boxer would be extremely frustrated because he wouldn’t know how to make his trainer listen. Because he is isolated from the world, he would have to trust his trainer as he always had. He may reason that the trainer was the one who got him to the top in the first place. Second, the boxer would get creamed in his future matches. All his opponents would discover his bad rib and position themselves to maximize their advantage against this weakness. OCD sufferers are like this boxer. We are weakened in our ability to fight our intrusive thoughts due to our hidden physical injury. Our continual struggle to feel God’s presence or be more obedient in an effort to overcome the illness results in futility over and over again. And this leaves us in despair. Our injury is hidden, and the lack of support from other Christians who cannot see the real physical nature of OCD can contribute to our hopelessness. To say Satan never uses these situations to his advantage is naïve in my opinion.

Basically I think there are 2 extremes that most of the population lives in.....scrupulosity is fully spiritual, or scrupulosity is fully medical. Neither of those extremes is comforting to the Christian with OCD. There are some things I'd like to say specific to what you are feeling. #1 is that Christians are flawed, and are sinners like everyone else. They can be judgmental or arrogant or give advice that is destructive. And yes, we can definitely have mental illness. This does not make God any less good or real than He is. In fact, the good that you seen in Christians is because God has changed their hearts. The bad that you see in us is caused by the sinful nature that every living person has inside of them. I say this b/c I never want someone to discredit God b/c of the failures of His people. He is still perfect, holy, slow to anger, full of grace, incredibly patient, and loving towards you. I have found that a true grasp of God's GRACE is one of the most powerful tools in fighting this disorder. In Chapter 9 of my book I call the grace of God the kryptonite of OCD. In the same way that darkness is eliminated in the presence of light, I am confident that OCD loses much of it power as we live in God's grace.

A couple of final thoughts I had....some parts of Christianity have confusion about certain aspects of the faith. Some are so extreme as to think that true Christians live perfectly sinless lives. This leads people to become either very self-righteous (they actually think their actions and hearts are now perfect), or they live in a constant state of panic because every bad thought or sin makes them think they are destined for hell....so they are constantly "converting" to Christianity. But again - bad theology doesn't make the gospel any less amazing....it is people's mis-understanding of theology that leads people to say and do the things you most dislike.

And I felt like you may like this verse for some reason: 2 Timothy 2:13 - If we are faithless, He remains faithful; He cannot deny Himself.

Hello! I'd like to ask you how did you manage your religious OCD ?

Oh sorry for the long response - here is one more snippet from my book you may find helpful - or at least relateable! You are right, so much of the church misses this and my hope is to spread the word about this disorder and how to properly address it in the church (which sometimes needs to be by humbly acknowledging we don't fully understand and refer other to professionals): Furthermore, the field of medicine recognizes OCD as a medical illness. Psychiatrist Ian Osborn, MD, writes: Indeed, the majority of recent scientific papers on OCD deal with the biomedical aspect of the illness. Research in this area is so impressive that the United States Congress has seen fit to include OCD among a small group of mental disorders covered by the Mental Health Equitable Treatment Act. Thus, OCD has been officially recognized as being just as “biologically based” as diabetes or heart disease, and therefore deserving of the same insurance coverage. I love that Osborn states that OCD is “as biologically based as diabetes” because both conditions are treated by changing a chemical level in the body. Diabetes is treated by introducing insulin into the blood stream to lower blood glucose levels, andsome medications used to treat OCD (known as SSRIs) increase serotonin levels. In terms of morality, I find it is hard to argue that treating diabetes by reducing blood glucose with insulin is any different than treating low serotonin levels with SSRIs. However, the way believers typically view the approach to coping with diabetes and OCD can be quite different. In high school, a diabetic girl in our youth group passed out during a sermon and was in dire need of sugar (her insulin shot had dangerously lowered her blood sugar level). Someone alerted the pastor, who immediately asked the congregation if anyone had candy or glucose pills. A few medical doctors, including my mom, rushed to assist the girl, while the pastor prayed for her recovery before proceeding with his sermon. Nobody stood up to protest the request for sugar, and I’m not aware of anyone who contacted the church leadership team to convey their disapproval. Why? Because diabetes is accepted as a medical (physical) condition by both secular society and nearly all denominations of Christianity. However, I have met numerous people, including close family members, who clearly object to using medication to treat OCD. Even for some who understand that OCD is partially a chemical problem, the stigma surrounding the use of medicine for mental illness is difficult to overcome. I believe that this stigma is rooted in the belief that OCD is in no way a physical or medical issue and is solely spiritual. If that were not the belief, then the same Christians that advocate for the use of medicine to control diabetes would claim that diabetes should be fought only within the spiritual realm.

I'd like to say something to you. I've been an atheist most of my life but now I'm Muslim. your ideas and opinion about religion is something that should be respected, you do not need to explain yourself to anyone. proud of your survival from all your struggles because of religion. and good luck to you in your journey.

Everyone's screwed up a little, just gotta decide what you want I In your life 😅